大家好 Hello.
我是安迪… I am Andy...
谢谢大家来观看我的电影 and I would like to thank you for coming to my movie.
我本来希望它精彩一点 I wish it was better, you know,
但… 它是如此的乏味 but... it is so stupid.
糟透了 我自己也不喜欢 It's terrible. I-I do not even like it.
我生命里最重要的事… All of the most important things in my life...
都改变了… a-a-are changed around and mixed up...
为了… for, um...
戏剧 uh, dramatic purposes.
所以… So...
我决定剪掉… I decided to cut out...
所有的废话 all of the baloney.
现在电影断多了 Now the movie is much shorter.
其实 In fact,
这…是结尾 this... is the end of the movie.
谢谢大家 Thank you very much.
我是认真的 I am not fooling.
再见 Good-bye.
Go.
你们还在这 Wow. You're still here.
好 O-kay!
我希望你们耐心点 I hope you're not upset.
我那样做是为了排除那些… 不理解我的人… I did that to get rid of those folks who just... wouldn't understand me...
我甚至不想试 and don't even want to try.
事实上 这部电影真的很精彩 Actually, the movie is really great.
里面有形形色色的人物 It's just filled with colorful characters,
就象我已经拍的 和正在拍的片 like the one I just did and the one I'm doing now.
我们的故事开始了… Our story begins...
让我们回到古老的岛屿 back in Great Neck, Long Island.
这是我的家 This is our house.
那是我爸爸的老车 And that's my father's old car.
那是我爸爸 That's my father.
那是我的小弟弟迈克尔 That's my little brother Michael.
那是我的小妹妹卡罗尔 That's my little sister Carol.
- 那是我妈妈 - 贾尼斯? - And that's my mom. - Janice?
安迪在房间里吗? Andy's up in his room?
在 Yeah.
伯尔先生说凯特夫 把他的头砍掉了 Mr. Bear is saying that Mrs. Cat made his head fall off.
她看见了 这不是真的 She saw it And it's not true.
今天的嘉宾,伯尔先生 Today's special guest, Mr. Bear.
- 怎么了 伯尔先生？ - 安迪？ - What's up, Mr. Bear? - Andy?
儿子 不要再闹了 Son, this has got to stop.
我们的家不是电视台 Our house is not a television station.
墙上没有照相机 There's not a camera in that wall.
这上不行的 你应该到外面去演 I mean, this is not healthy. You should be outside playing sports.
可我有自己的演播室 But I have my own sports show.
安迪, 你知道我不是这个意恩 Andy, you know that's not what I meant.
看 我把脚放下去 就没地方演了 Look, I'm gonna put my foot down. No more playing alone.
- 要表演 你必须有观众 - 他们在那边 - You want to perform, you have got to have an audience. - They're right there!
那不是观众 那是石灰膏 That is not an audience. That is plaster.
观众是由活着的 会呼吸的人组成的 An audience is made of people, people who live and breathe.
安迪·考夫曼和霍迪在场… Andy Kaufman and Howdy Doody present...
"动物歌"！ "The Animal Song"!
我唱动物 你告诉我是什么 I'm gonna say the animal, and then you tell me what it says.
- 好吗？ - 好的 - Okay? - Okay.
- Oh, the cow goes... - Moo.
- And the cat goes... - Meow! Meow!
And the bird goes...
- Tweet, tweet. - Tweet, tweet!
And the lion goes...
Roar!
- And the dog goes - Ruff.
- And the cat goes - Meow.
- And the bird goes - Tweet.
- And the pig goes - Oink.
And that's the way it goes
- 安迪·考夫曼的喜剧风格 - 谢谢 - The comedy stylings of Andy Kaufman. - Thank you.
比萨曼先生, 明天同样演出吗? So, Mr. Besserman, same spot tomorrow?
我不知道,安迪, 我想我得让你走了 I don't know, Andy. I think I have to let you go.
你要解雇我? You're firing me?
你… 甚至不付我钱 You... You don't even pay me.
我不想被人侮辱 你只是个业余者 I don't want to seem insulting, but your act is like amateur hour.
六年来你只会唱歌 像傀儡一样缺乏趣味 You're doing sing alongs for six-year-olds and puppets that aren't funny.
- 放录音带? - 但那完全是原唱 - Playing records? - But it's totally original.
没人那样做过 我跟其它人不一样 No one's ever done it. I'm not like everyone else.
其它人把这当餐厅 Well, everybody else gets this place cookin'.
我认为这就是个餐厅 那边的那个人真是乱来 I thought it was cooking. There was a man over here that was really upset.
他大叫一声 很多人中场离开了 He stormed out, and a lot of other people left in the middle of your act.
- 我的酒席卖不出去… - 这不是喜剧 也不是艺术 - I can't sell booze... - It's not about comedy. It's not about art.
- 是有关我的酒席 - 当你唱歌时,我卖不出去酒席 - It's about booze. - I can't sell booze when you're singing "Pop Goes the Weasel."
- 就是这个问题 - 我在这做生意 - That's all that matters. - I'm running a business here.
是娱乐生意 娱乐生意 娱乐生意 It's show business. Show business. Show business.
,没有生意,哪来娱乐 Without the business, there's no show.
- 没场地给你演出 - 你要我怎么做? - There's no show for you. - Wh-What do you want me to do?
- "请带走我的妻子"? - 至少要有个玩笑 试试开一些玩笑 - "Take my wife, please"? - At least it's a joke. Try some jokes.
象"为什么连体婴儿去英国?" Like, "Why did the Siamese twins go to England?"
我不知道,为什么他们去英国? I don't know. Why did they go to England?
所以有人就会编故事 So the other one could drive.
可是他们为什么知道怎么编呢 But why doesn't the other one just learn how to drive?
也许你不擅长这个 Whew. Maybe that one isn't for you.
编一些感人的交通故事 But do jokes about the traffic, do impressions,
也许还有些悲伤的素村 maybe some blue material.
谢谢大家 晚上好 Thank you very much. Goodnight!
现在 Now?
现在 Now.
谢谢大家 Thank you very much.
我不喜欢… One thing I do not like...
拥挤的交通 is too much traffic.
你们知道? You know?
今晚我必须来… Tonight I had to come...
从… from... uh...
从高速公路 A-And the freeway,
路上交通很拥挤 it-it was so much traffic.
我花了一个半小时才到这 I-It took me an hour and a half to get here.
可是… 可… But... But...
谈起糟糕的事… talking about the terrible things...
我妻子… 拿我妻子来说 My wife... take my wife. Please take her.
Ugh.
不 No.
不,我只是开玩笑 No. I am only fooling.
我… 我爱我的妻子 I... I-I love my wife,
但她不知道怎么做饭 but she don't know how to cook.
她的手艺不好 Her cooking is so bad.
- 很糟糕 - 不 - It's terrible. - No.
现在我- 我想… Now I-I would like to...
我想为你们… I would like to do for you...
模仿一下 the imitations.
我想从… I would like to start...
吉米·卡特开始 with the... the Jimmy Carter.
美国总统 The president of the United States.
大家好,我是吉米·卡特 Hello, I am Jimmy Carter,
美国总统 the president of the United States.
天哪 God!
非常感谢 Thank you very much.
现在我要为你们… And now I would like to do for you...
表演… the...
埃尔维斯·普雷斯 the Elvis Presley.
Well, it's one for the money two for the show three to get ready
Now go, cat, go Now, don't you
Step on my blue suede shoes
Well, you can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes
Let's go, cat!
巴德,这家伙是哪里人 Budd, what's the story with this guy?
他来自立陶宛 I think he's from Lithuania.
Oh, blue, blue blue suede shoes
Baby, blue, blue blue suede shoes, honey
Blue, blue blue suede shoes, baby
Blue, blue blue suede shoes
You can do anything but lay off of my blue suede shoes
Oh, well we were dancin'
We were dancin'
To the jailhouse rock
All right!
Whoo!
谢谢 Thank you very much.
嗨,我真的很欣赏你的表演 Hey, I really enjoyed your set.
我没有让你吃惊吧 我很喜欢你在那边的表演 I didn't mean to startle you. I really liked what you did out there.
非常感谢 Thank you very much.
我知道你来自立陶宛 So I understand you're from Lithuania.
我来自里海 No, I am from Caspiar.
里海? Caspiar, huh?
那里是里海的一个小岛 It is a very small island in the Caspian Sea.
陷下去了 It sunk.
哦,对不起 Oh, I'm sorry. Uh...
我可能搞错了 Look, uh, I'm probably out of my mind,
但我觉得你很有趣 but I think you're very interesting,
如果你需要什么条件 我们可以谈谈 and if you ever need representation, we should talk.
好的 Okay.
夏皮罗先生 "George Shapiro." Mr. Shapiro.
Wow.
- 这是我的荣幸先生 - 里海? - It is an honor, sir. - Caspiar, huh?
我想成为世界上最好的名星 I wanna be the biggest star in the world.
人们喜欢喜剧演员 Well, people love comedians.
我不是喜剧演员 也不会搞笑 I'm not a comedian. I don't do jokes.
我不知道什么是好笑,我是个歌舞演员 I don't even know what's funny. I'm a song-and-dance man.
谢谢 - Oh, yeah. - Thank you.
我特别提议莲藕 Uh, I particularly suggest the lotus root.
可是,你… Um, but y-y-you, uh,
你知道,你承诺了很多 you know, you show a lot of promise.
我关心的是 我不知道让你在哪演出 And my concern is I don't know where to book you.
你不是喜剧演员 You're not a stand-up, and, uh,
你的表演不会拍成电影,所以… your act doesn't exactly translate itself to film, so...
Um...
所以你帮帮我 你自己想去哪里 So help me. Where do you see yourself?
我一直想在卡内基音乐堂演出 Well, I've always wanted to play Carnegie Hall.
真好笑 That's funny.
我不想得到廉价的笑声 See, I don't want to go for cheap laughs.
我想得到知名人士的认可 I want real gut reactions.
我想要有见识的观众 I want the audience to have gone through an experience.
他们爱我,恨我,离开都可以 They love me, they hate me, they walk out. It's all great.
- 安迪,你这有个东西 - Andy, you got a little something... - Hmm?
Oh.
当我出名了 我会卖掉他们 When I'm famous, I'm gonna sell these,
因为是安迪用过的 as worn by Andy Kaufman.
这个给你 You can have this one.
因为是我鼻子上的值很多钱 It's probably gonna be worth a lot 'cause it was actually up my nose.
你神经病 You're insane!
也许你很聪明 But you might also be brilliant.
喂,我是乔治·夏皮罗 Hello. George Shapiro here.
…是乔治·夏皮罗吗? Uh... yeah! Is this George Shapiro ?
- 是的 请讲 - 好的 - Yeah, speaking. - Speaking!
烟雾弥漫 叽叽喳喳 捉摸不定 Reeking, seeking, creaking. Freaking!
有人告诉我 我不知道的事 Big freaking deal! Tell me something I don't know, toadstool!
我能帮你吗? Can I help you with something?
你离安迪·考夫曼远点 这样对你有好处 Yeah, you can stay away from Andy Kaufman, if you know what's good for you.
- 机轴 - 是谁? - Crankshaft! - Who is this?
不要歪曲我的话 玩具狮子狗 Do not twist my noodle, toy poodle!
是克利夫顿,一个受尊敬的名字 一个畏惧的名字 This is Tony Clifton, a name to respect, a name to fear!
- 考夫曼是个骗子 他是个神经病 - Kaufman is a lying bastard. He is a psychopath!
现在慢慢地睁开你的眼睛 Now slowly open your eyes.
你应该感到轻松 You should feel rested, relaxed and alert.
谢谢你,师博 Uh, I would like to thank you, Your Holiness.
我的心在释放出活力 My heart is radiating pure energy.
- 好的… - 不 等等 - Okay... - Oh, no. Wait.
等等… - 抱歉 Wait. Uh... I'm sorry.
我有个问题请敦 Uh, I have a question.
有… Is there...
成为滑稽人物有秘诀吗? Is there a secret to being funny?
有 Yes.
沉默 Silence.
欢迎回到星期六夜生活 Welcome back to Saturday Night Live.
作为我们晚会的第一个节目 And now, as a special treat on our first show,
有请我们的嘉宾安迪·考夫曼 musical guest Andy Kaufman!
这家伙怎么了 What's wrong with this guy?
气氛死板 This is dead air.
Band]
Mr. Trouble never hangs around
When he hears this mighty sound
- Here I come to save the day
That means that Mighty Mouse is on his way
Yes, sir, when there is a wrong to right
Mighty Mouse will join the fight
On the sea or on the land
He gets the situation well in hand
So though we are in danger we never despair
'Cause we know that where there's danger he is there
- He is there on the land, on the sea
In the air
- We're not worrying at all
We're just listening for his call
- Here I come to save the day
That means that Mighty Mouse is on the way
考夫曼先生? - Mr. Kaufman? - Hmm? Oh.
这边请 Hi. Right this way, please.
- 好的 - 乔治找你 - Okay. - George is expecting you.
嗨,安迪 Hey, Andy.
嗨 Hey.
- 谢谢你赏脸 - 谢谢你 乔治 - Thanks for coming out. - Oh, thank you, George.
过来,坐呀 - Come on, sit down. - Um, oh.
- 坐那里? - 哪里都可以 - Wow, they're... Which one? - Either one.
- 都是红的 - 是 - They're both red. - Yeah.
坐这个吧 This one, I guess.
- 路上还好吗? - 还好 - So did you have a nice flight? - I-I did.
路途非常偷快 女乘务员非常漂亮 I had a really good flight, and the stewardess was very, very nice.
她允许我带耳机 And she allowed me to keep my headphones.
那很好啊 - Oh, that's terrific! - Yep. Mm-hmm.
安迪,我有更好的想法 Andy, I got something better.
- 是吗? - 是的 - You do? - Yeah.
这很重要 This is big.
好的 Okay.
- 好的? - 好的 - Okay? - Okay.
你有个绝好的机会 You are getting a once-in-a-lifetime,
非常有利的机会… very lucrative opportunity...
在黄金时间演网络连续剧 to star on a prime time network sitcom!
- 连续剧? - 是的 - A sitcom? - Yeah.
这是个很好的剧本 And this is a class act.
故事发生在 一个出租车招呼站里 It all takes place in a taxi stand.
你演弗洛兹 And you're gonna be the Fonzie.
我是…弗洛兹? I'm... Fonzie?
不,不,不 No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no.
弗洛兹 是个疯狂的人物… The Fonzie, the crazy, breakout character...
他模仿各种好笑的动作 who all the kids imitate,
他们把他放在午餐盒里 and they put him on the lunch boxes.
- 我不喜欢连续剧,乔治 我从来就不喜欢他们 - 等等 - I hate sitcoms, George. I've never liked them. - Hold on.
- 这些家伙见过你的另一面 - 是吗? - These guys have seen your foreign man character. - Yeah?
他们想把他变成… And they wanna turn him...
一个可爱的傻技工… into a lovable, goofy mechanic...
名叫… named...
拉特卡 Latka.
- 不行 - 不行? - Uh, no. - No?
- 不行 - 哪里不行? - No. - No to which part?
都不行,听起来不爽 No to the whole thing. It doesn't sound good to me.
- 安迪,这是每个喜剧演员的梦想 - 我不是喜剧演员 - Andy, this is every comedian's dream! - I'm not a comedian.
连续剧在娱乐表演中不受欢迎 A-And sitcoms are the lowest form of entertainment.
我是说,它只是… I mean, it's just...
乏味的玩笑和录制好的笑声 stupid jokes and canned laughter!
你不知道为什么一下在这 一下在那 And you don't know why it's there, but it's there.
都是呆滞人的笑声 你知道吗？ 那些人很木讷 It's dead people laughing. Did you know that? Those people are dead!
这是… 这是很好的剧本 This is... This is classy.
我不在乎 I-I don't care.
我想写我自己的素材 I-I wanna generate my-my own material.
听我说 Look, I-listen. Listen to me.
我做这个生意20年了 Look, I've been in this business for 20 years!
我明白,我熟悉这行 I know. I've seen this! I know this.
如果你错过了这个机会 If you pass up this opportunity,
就不会再有这样的机会了 you will never, never see another one like it again.
永远不会 Never!
是的 Yeah.
- 好,我答应 - Okay. I'll do it. - Ah.
- 可我有条件 - 当然可以 - But I have some terms. - Oh, sure.
一切都好商谈 That's... That's what negotiations are all about.
- 你在干什么? - 在写我的条件 - What are you doing? - I'm writing out my terms.
你跟我开什么玩笑? Wh... What, are you making fun of me?
- 那些是我的条件 - 这很荒唐 - Those are my terms. - Th-This is ridiculous.
这是我需要的 我需要这来演出 It's what I need. It's what I need to do the show.
这是什么? 上面说"保证给托尼·克利夫顿四场演出" Wh-What is this? It says, "Four guaranteed guest spots for Tony Clifton."
- 谁是托尼·克利夫顿? - 是维加斯的一个歌唱家 - Who's Tony Clifton? - He's a Vegas lounge singer.
我以前对他印象很深 And, um, I used to do impressions of him,
我们打过一次架 and we sort of got into a fight over it.
- 这个托尼·克利夫顿给我打电话了 - 他给你打电话了? - This Clifton called me. - He did?
- 他是个疯子,他讨厌你 - 不,不,不 - He's a loon! He hates you. - No, no, no.
他只是说话很刻薄 但我很感激他 He just talks tough, but I owe him.
如果我是新弗洛兹 And if I'm the new Fonz,
那么ABC一定会满足我的要求 then ABC is just gonna have to... give me what I want!
嗨 Hey!
半小时之后考夫曼先生就来了 Mr. Kaufman will only appear in half the episodes of Taxi.
考夫曼先生要求 在电影之前有90分钟的沉默 Mr. Kaufman requires an undisturbed 90 minutes of meditation prior to filming.
考夫曼先生要有他自己的特别网 Uh, Mr. Kaufman gets his own network special.
出租车表演必须保证… And, uh, Taxi must guarantee...
四个临时演员 为托尼·克利夫顿表演 four guest appearances for Tony Clifton.
谁? 谁? Who? Who?
托尼·克利夫顿 Tony Clifton.
托尼·克利夫顿到底是谁 Who the hell is Tony Clifton?
Uh...
我不知道 I don't know.
现在… And now...
现在最激动人心的时刻… now Mama Rivoli's is proud to present...
来了 an international singing sensation!
女士们,先生们 有请托尼·克利夫顿先生 Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Tony Clifton!
Ha!
快点 Come on.
好了 All right, all right!
女士们,先生们 Ladies and gentlemen, uh,
由于托尼·克利夫顿先生嗓音的限制 出于对他的尊敬 due to Mr. Clifton's vocal constraints, out of respect for him,
他请求你们是否愿意灭掉… he asks that if you please extinguish...
燃烧的物体,你们的雪茄和烟 your smoking material, your cigars and cigarettes.
有没搞错,那支雪茄我花了l0美元 Goddamn! I paid ten bucks for that cigar!
对不起 Uh, I'm sorry.
- 他在开玩笑嘛? - 现在 - Is he joking? - And now,
女士们,先生们,表演开始了 ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Entertainment,
有请托尼·克利夫顿 Tony Clifton!
他在干什么? What does he think he's doing?
Vo...
...lare, whoa
Ca-wa-wa-wa-wa-wantare whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
No wonder my happy heart sings
Your love has given me wings
I got the wings of a dove
I got the wings
I got the chicken wings from Kentucky Fried...
Whoop-de-doo, whoop-de-di!
Stick a-a needle in your eye!
- 哦,我的天啊 - 各位, 让我们来点特别的东西 - Oh, my God. - Let's get somethin' straight, people.
在维加斯,我开了个大陈列室 I play big showrooms in Vegas.
我需要这个地方 就像需要鸟枪爆炸 I need this place like I need a shotgun blast to the face!
现在我下去见见观众 Now, let's go do wn andmeet some ofthe audience.
好了 All right.
你好? 你来自哪里? How are you all doin'? Where you from? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
这儿有人洒了香水 Whoa! Somebody's wearin' a lot of perfume around here!
一定是刚才 - Must be that time of the month, huh?
我知道所有的鬼把戏 你好？ Yeah, I know all the tricks. How are you doin'?
你喜欢意大利面包吗? You havin' a... You enjoyin' that pasta carbonara?
它会出现在你面前 It appears that you are.
当心,你们坐在了松软干酪上 Whoops! Hey, look out! I think you sat in some cottage cheese.
原谅我那是你们的屁股 Oh, pardon me. That's your ass.
Aww!
你好.你喜欢表演吗? How you doin'? You enjoyin' the show?
喜欢 - Yeah. - Huh?
你叫什么名字? - Yeah. - What's your name?
鲍勃 Bob.
鲍勃 Bob! Bo-o-ob!
Bo-o-ob! Bo-o-ob!
你姓什么? - What's your last name? Up and down in the water? - Ugh.
格斯克 Huh?
格斯克 Gorsky.
- 格斯克?是波兰姓 - Gorsky? That Polish? - Yeah.
讲讲波兰的笑话吧 You tryin' to do some Polish humor?
- 不 那是… - 住嘴 - No, that's, uh... - Shut up!
- 那只是我的名字 - 住嘴 - That's just my name. - Shut up!
我不喜欢种族歧视 I do not appreciate, uh, racial slurs!
波兰人被嘲笑够了 I think them dumb Polacks been ridiculed enough.
我在这表演 I do a clean show here.
你们想看笑话吗 这儿正好有笑话 You wanna see some humor? Here's some humor right here.
这儿,好吗? Right there, okay? Awww!
坐下,享受 Sit down and enjoy that, okay?
你是… 夏皮罗 And you... Shapiro!
我会在后台见你,秃子 I'll see you backstage, baldy.
Vo...
...lare
你想干什么? What do you want?
只是友好的交谈,乔治 Just a little friendly conversation, George.
你饿了? You hungry?
你看起来很瘦 You look thin!
你… 你… Y-You-You...
Italiano, cacciatore scallopini, pasta fazool
我搞不懂这种表演 I don't understand this act.
是种很好的古老娱乐 乔治 人人都喜欢恶棍 It's good, old-fashioned entertainment, George. Everyone loves a villain.
- 你怎么看待你羞辱的可怜虫? - 嗨,老兄,表演很精彩 - What about that poor schlub you humiliated? - Hey, man, excellent show.
- 很精彩的表演 - 对你来说是很精彩的 乔治 - That was a great show. - Yeah, good show for you. Um, George.
这是我的作者,老朋友鲍勃 This is, uh, my writer and old friend Bob Zmuda.
你好,乔治,我是鲍勃 Hey, George. How are you? I'm Bob.
- 他很有创意 - 是的 - He's very creative. - Yes.
- 我是这次活动的策划者 - 很有创意 - I am the brains behind this operation. - Dream on.
他曾经设计过 一个从芝加哥动物园逃走的狮子 He once faked a lion escaping from the Chicago Zoo.
很奇怪,乔治 This was fantastic, George.
我们安排了40个演员在动物国排练 他们全都尖叫了起来 We got 40 actors tearin' through the zoo, they're all screamin'.
- 封闭了那个地方 - "各位,有只可恶的狮子" - Closed the place down. - "There's a fuckin' lion, man! A lion!"
你的名字不是格斯克 Your name's not Gorsky.
别相信你听到了一切,乔治 Don't believe everything you hear, George.
这不能离开他的房间 This cannot leave this room.
别把这写下来,好吗? Do not write this down, okay?
托尼·克利夫顿是安迪·考夫曼 Tony Clifton is Andy Kaufman.
安迪·考夫曼就是托尼·克利夫顿 And Andy Kaufman is Tony Clifton.
他们拒绝了,相信我,是真的 They'll deny it up and down, but believe me, it's true.
这是桩大买卖 This is great business.
你可以利用 两个安迪·考夫曼赚大钱 You get two Andy Kaufmans for the price of one.
- 安迪 安迪 - 什么事? - Andy. Andy. - What's up?
他们答应了 并把一切都准备好了 They said yes. You're gettin' everything. Everything!
伯勒斯 Bonus.
- 无论你想要什么 - 伯勒斯 非常谢谢你 - Whatever you want. - Bonus! Thank you very much.
- 我太高兴了 - 我必须乘出租车去,对吗? - It was so good. - I have to do Taxi, though, right?
- 你要乘出租车去 - 好的 - You gotta do Taxi. - Okay.
为拉特卡准备的宴会 Party time for Latka?
- 除非你把所有的事都干完了 - 是个很好的宴会 - Not until you take off those overalls. - This is a good party.
不,不拉特卡!听我说,听我说 No, no, Latka! Listen to me. Listen to me.
这些饼干里有毒 There's a drug in those cookies.
不 No!
没有,没有 No. No!
床? Bed?
在我生命里… I have never been so emotional...
从来没有这样的激情 in all my life.
这是替我妈妈打的 这是替我爸爸打的 And this is for my mother, and this is for my father!
这是替我祖父打的 And this is for my grand father!
我希望你有个小家 I hope you have a small family.
- Ohh! - Whee-ooh!
- 谢谢 - 谢谢 - 谢谢 - Thank you very much. - Thank you very much. - Thank you very much.
谢谢 Thank you very much!
- 我要辞职 - 什么? - I'm gonna quit. - What?
一场比一场糟糕 Every show is worse than the last one.
考夫曼,每天有四千万人在观看你的屁股 Forty million people are watching your ass every week, Kaufman.
- 他们知道什么? - 没什么事,那是很美的 - What do they know? - Absolutely nothing! And that's the beauty.
老兄,绝对可信 Man, look, it's credibility.
你让他们爱上了你 那么稍后 You make them love you now, and then later on,
在你的专题里 你可以搞他们的头 on your special, you can fuck with their heads.
机遇是有限的,老兄 The sky is the limit, man.
我不在乎 Oh, yeah? I don't care!
先生 考夫曼的特别节目 有点问题 Sir, there 's a problem down on the Kaufman special.
- 他们说技术条件达不到 - 技术? - They say he's not following the technical requirements. - Technical?
谢谢你来到我的演出现场 Thanks for coming on my show.
很荣幸跟你一起演出,安迪 Thanks for having me on your show, Andy.
- 马上关掉 - 不 - Right now, roll it! - No.
是我的特别节目 我有权力控制 关掉 It's my special! I have creative control. Now roll it!
- 不! - 演啊,老兄 - No! - Do it, man!
- 嗨,安迪,你好 - 小心点 - Hey, Andy! Hi. - Be careful, please.
只有正面 Only positive energy allowed beyond this point.
我一直在听关于 特别报道的事情 I've been hearing fabulous things about the special.
我们打了那个小家伙? What, did we hit a little speed bump?
他的名字叫科林 Mm-hmm, and his name is Colin.
他让我捣乱 Kid Genius told me to mess with the vertical hold.
- 让我看看 - 让他看看 - Show me. - Show him.
让他看看,科林 Show him, Colin.
谢谢你让我上你的节目,安迪 Thanks for having me on your show, Andy.
这真是… Boy, it sure...
太好了 人们以为他们的电视坏了 It'll be great. People will think their TV is broken.
他们会离开电视前 走上前 They'll get out of their chairs, walk over to the TV,
打电话给电视台 twist the knobs, call the TV store.
"我付了那么多钱" "I paid a lot of money for that TV!"
他们会拍电视 但是怎么也弄不好 They'll bang on the television, but they won't be able to fix it!
安迪,安迪 Andy. Andy.
我们不想观众离开电视 We don't want the viewers to get out of their chairs.
可这很有趣 But it's funny.
这是恶作剧 It's a practical joke.
观众一定能看节目 The viewer must be able to see the program.
但… 它只有30秒 But... But it's only gonna be for 30 seconds.
- 五秒 - 20秒 - Five. - Twenty.
l0秒 Ten.
成交 Deal.
好了,安迪,l0秒? - l0秒,好啊 - Okay, Andy. Ten seconds, huh? - Ten seconds, okay.
- 好的 - 好的 - Okay. - Okay.
- 我只想要l0秒 - l0秒是最好的 - Ten seconds is all I really wanted. - Ten seconds is perfect.
你知道 霍迪 当我是孩子时就一直在关注你 You know, Howdy, I've been watching you since I was a little boy.
我甚至不知道电视是什么 I didn't even know what television was.
看他多可爱,很精彩,不是吗? Oh, look at how cute he is, huh? Isn't this great?
- 很感人 - 你个其它的真人在屏幕上演出 - That is so moving. - You're as real as anyone else on the show.
我爱你,我真的很爱你 And I love you. I really do.
这没意思 This is not funny.
一点也不可笑… This is artsy-fartsy shit. I mean, what...
这是节目里的神秘部分 呆会就会好的 This is the magical part of the show. The show's not all like this.
真可笑,真有趣 It's hysterical. It gets very funny.
看在上帝的份上 我们是因特网的一员 难道我们付不起钱? For Christ's sakes, we're the number one network. Can't we afford a decent TV?
不,不,那是节目的一部分 No, no, no, th-that's part of the show.
- 这是节目的一部分? - 是我 - This is part of the show? - Yes.
你什么意思 这是节目的一部分? What do you mean, it's part of the show?
那是安迪想要的 Th-That's the way Andy wants it, with the rolling.
谢谢你,安迪,我也爱你 Thanks, Andy. I love you too.
告诉考夫曼 这个网络不再转播这个节目 Tell Kaufman this network will never air this program.
嗨,那是安迪·考夫曼 Hey, that's Andy Kaufman.
想打赌吗? Do you wanna bet?
嗨,嗨 Hey. Hey.
请问你是安迪·考夫曼吗 Hey, excuse me. Are you Andy Kaufman?
我一直叫安迪·考夫曼 I get that all the time.
安迪 Andy.
真是荒唐 This is ridiculous.
拿掉围裙 Take off that apron.
不 我宁愿呆在这而不愿回ABC No. I'd rather work here than at ABC.
- 对不起 他们都是一群混蛋 - 是的 - Ah, I'm sorry. They're a bunch of assholes. - Yeah.
我们做的是有创意的工作 没必要分明什么人喜欢什么人不喜欢 We work in a creative business. There's no telling what people are gonna like or dislike.
我这样做的唯一的理由… The only reason why I did Taxi... the only reason...
是我想要我自己的专集 was so that I could have my own special.
我知道 我告诉你 I know. I'll tell you what.
我给你安排在一些大学演出 Let me book you some colleges now,
然后把这些专集带过去 and then I'll take the special around.
给人们看看这些专集 看是否有人愿意买 I'll show it to people and see if anybody wants to buy it.
我们有一车库的专集要出售 不 我要结束了 We'll have a garage sale. No, I'm over and out.
- 你知道 你没结束 - 我结束了 - You know, you're not over and out. - I am over and out.
- 你不能结束 - 我结束给你看看 - You can't be over and out. - I'll show you over and out.
你跟ABC有个协议 你应该尊重它 You've got a deal with ABC. You've gotta honor it.
好吧 合同的日期还剩多久? All right. How much longer's left on my contract?
你签了五年 You signed for five years, so...
还有四年七个月 four years and seven months.
谢谢大家 Thank you.
来到这真的很高兴 It's really great to be here.
今晚 一定有场精彩的演出 We're gonna have a great show tonight.
真的很精彩 Really good one!
首先 我们要唱一些歌 We're gonna... We're gonna start by singing some songs.
- 演拉特卡！ - 是的 拉特卡 - Do Latka! - Yeah, Latka!
快演拉特卡 Come on, Latka!
拉特卡 拉特卡 拉特卡 Latka! Latka! Latka!
- 拉特卡 拉特卡 - 对不起离开一会 - Latka! Latka! - Excuse me for one second.
- 我看到了 - 什么? - I saw that. - What?
- 给我剧本 - 什么剧本?不 我不会给你剧本的 - Give me the book. - What book? No, I'm not going to give you the book.
- 有什么事吗? - 没有 一切都很好 - Is something wrong? - No, everything's okay. Fine.
我可以勉强演演你的主人翁 谢谢 - Can I squeeze your nuts? Thanks. - Ohh!
他们要这个 They're askin' for it.
女士们先生们 由于你们是如此… Ladies and gentlemen, since you're such a...
热情… special audience...
Yeah!
我第一次演出 I'm going to reveal for the very first time,
真实的自我 ever, the real me.
好 That's right.
我实际上是英国人 Ahem. I'm actually British.
虽然我演小丑 可我发现这是如此的粗野 And though I dabble in clowning, I do find it so boorish,
所以…各位 so... American.
我更喜欢美术… I prefer the fine arts, henceforth, today...
我要与你们分享… I am going to grace you with a reading...
一篇伟大的著作 of one of the greatest novels ever written,
由菲茨杰拉克写的"了不起的盖茨比" The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.
开始 Please.
"在我年轻容易受到伤害的时候 "In my younger and more vulnerable years,
我父亲给了我很多忠告 我一直深深的记在我的大脑里 my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since.
无论你什么时候受到挫折 他告诉我 'Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone,' he told me,
- 拉特卡 - 只是记住世界上所有的人… - Latka! - 'just remember that all the people of this world...
- 拉特卡！ - 不比你占优势 - Latka! - haven't had the advantages that you've had.'
但他总是以一种沉默的方式交谈 But he'd always been unusually communicative in a reserved way,
可我明白他的意恩… and I understood that he meant...
比说更有价值 a great deal more than that."
谢谢大家 Thank you very much.
Yeah!
结果 "In consequence,
我保留了所以的判断 I'm inclined to reserve all judgments,
- 一种无所谓的性格 - a habit that has opened up many curious natures to me...
让我成了枪下的牺牲品 and also made me the victim of not a few veteran bores."
- 快点 - 不 不 - Oh, come on! - No, no. No, no.
保持安静 我们还有很多要听 No, no, please keep it down. We've got a long way to go.
他们是相同的人 "They were the same people,
至少是同类型的人 or at least the same sort of people, the same profusion of..."
我告诉你们 I tell you what.
你们是愿意读还是听唱片 Would you rather I kept reading, or do you prefer to hear the phonograph record?
听唱片 Record!
- 对不起 我听不见 - 听唱片 - I'm sorry. I can't hear you. - Record!
- 你们同意吗? - 同意 - Are you positive? - Yeah!
- 很好 - 是 大老鼠 - Very well then. - Yeah, "Mighty Mouse"!
他的出现给那晚带来了压抑 "His presence gave the evening it's quality of oppressiveness.
那个夏天 盖茨比深深的印在我记忆里" It stands out in my memory from Gatsby's other parties that summer."
绿灯 狂欢节… The green light, the orgiastic future...
- 年年在我们面前出现 that year by year recedes before us.
明天 Tomorrow...
明天我们会过的更快 Tomorrow we will run faster,
把我们的臂膀伸向未来 stretch our arms out further,
又是个美好的旱晨 and one fine morning,
所以我们波浪似的扑向未来 船逆流而行 so we beat on, boats against the current,
不断把浪花… borne back ceaselessly...
推向过去" into the past."
结束了 The end.
好啊 All right!
你想在亚利桑那州演出吗 You wanna play Arizona State?
你给他们表演大老鼠 表演埃尔维斯 You give 'em Mighty Mouse. You give 'em Elvis.
- 我… 我给了他们了不起的盖茨比 - 是的 - I-I gave them The Great Gatsby. - Yes.
- 菲茨杰拉德的佳作 - 一篇名著 - F. Scott Fitzgerald's best work. - A classic.
- 他的伟大的代表作 - 我不关心这些 - His finest piece of work. - I don't care.
安迪 Andy.
安迪 你必须认真回答这个问题 Andy, you have to look inside and ask this question.
你在让谁快乐? Who are you trying to entertain?
是观众还是你自己? The audience or yourself?
对不起 Excuse me.
Ah.
- 鲍勃 我是… 我是… - 什么 乔治? - Bob. Bob, I'm-I'm... - What, George?
我担心安迪 I'm worried about Andy.
这样不好 他这样做会影响他的演出 This is not good. His stress level is affecting his work.
冷静点 乔治 担心也无济于事 Calm down, George. That's not gonna help anything.
看 Look, uh,
托尼·克利夫顿下周会进行演出 Tony Clifton is gonna go on Taxi next week.
应让他放松放松 解除压力 That should, uh, let him blow off steam and relieve the stress.
- 鲍勃 鲍勃 鲍勃 - 什么事? - Bob, Bob, Bob. - Okay?
安迪需要放松 这是你的工作 Andy needs to relax. This is your job.
- 你必须让他摆脱这一切 - 我的工作 - You have to take him away from all of this. - My job.
- 来呀? - 好 - Would you come on? - Okay.
Sh...
- 今天过的怎么样? - 很好啊 - Hi. How are you doin' today? - Fine.
- 嗨 很高兴见到你 - 很高兴见到你 - Hello. Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you.
- 你好? - 很好 - How are you? - Peachy.
Oh.
Yeah
- 我们现在怎么做? - 你跳啊 - What do... What do we do now? - Now you pick.
可如果我伤害了 她们的感情怎么办? But what if I... hurt somebody's feelings?
看在上帝的份上 你不会害任何人的感情 For Christ's sake, you're not gonna hurt anybody's feelings.
他们都是专业人员 They're... They're all professionals. All right?
好的 Okay.
挑哪个 All right. Which one?
我要两个 I will have both!
我要这个小姐和那个大奶子的 I will have this fraulein und the one with the big strudels.
Mach schnell, mach schnell!
我要杀了你 Oh, no. Zmuda, I'm gonna kill you.
绝妙的选择 Excellent choice.
- 嗨 - 嗨 - Hi. - Hi.
你们高兴吗? Are you having a good day?
这是很重要的一天 It's kind of a big day.
这是我的朋友 第一次和妓女在一起 It's my buddy's first time with a prostitute.
你在说什么 安迪几乎每个周末都来 What are you talkin' about? Andy comes here almost every weekend.
谁 安迪? Who, Andy?
他不会叫他自己安迪 Oh, he doesn't always call himself that.
有时他叫托尼 有时穿晚礼服 Sometimes he's Tony, and he wears a tux.
- Yeah - Oh, ho!
嗨 Hey, um,
如果… 如果我给你们俩… if... if I gave you both...
三百美元 three hundred dollars,
你们愿意 would you, um,
到好莱坞搅乱一场电视秀吗? come to Hollywood and help me destroy a TV show?
五百美元 Five hundred.
我是什么 哈里·霍迪尼? What am I, Harry Houdini, huh?
我们破产了 过来 女孩们 Oh, we busted through. Come on, girls.
欢迎到时事讽刺剧场 Welcome to the Follies "Bree-gere."
- 好了 他来了 托尼·克利夫斯 - 汽车表演 - Okay, here's the man. Tony Clifton. - Taxi, laxy.
- 迈克斯 还好吗 - 嗨 - Just the factsy, Maxie. - Hi.
嗨 你好? Hey, hot shot. How you doin'?
- 埃德·温伯格 - 开始 好吗? - Ed Weinberger. - Take a hike! Okay, all right, huh?
好的 All right.
- 我们做什么? - 这是你的剧本 托尼 - What are we doin', huh? - Here's your script, uh, Tony.
- 这是给我的剧本? - 是的 - That's the script I was given? - Yeah.
我必须要做的 好 让我看看 That's the one I have to do? Okay, let me see.
胡说 胡说 我的台词 Okay, bullshit, bullshit, my line.
胡说 胡说 我的台词 Bullshit, bullshit, my line.
Ohh! Ha-ha!
那是好笑！ 那是好笑 That's hilarious! That is hilarious!
昨晚我已经看过剧本了 我不满意 I reviewed that script last night and I was not satisfied.
- 那么… - 我不满意 - Yeah, well... - I was not satisfied.
- 我们何不… - 所以我做了点改动 - Why don't we... - So I made a few changes.
我和这两个小姐熬了整夜 I stayed up all night with these sweet ladies right here.
这位是莱蒙纳德 This is Lemonade.
- 那会让你一天都红火 - 我们可以开始吗？ - That'll keep you going on a hot day. - Can we get to work?
这是迈娜丽亚 我的小生产部怎么样? And this is Melonia. How's my little produce department?
Honk, honk, honk, honk, honk.
这就是新的出租车主题歌 This is the new Taxi theme song.
Oh, yes we drive a taxi
Aaaah!
Aah-aah-aah-aah-ahh!
乔治 George.
现在 我们承担不起这个损失… Now, I can't afford to blow this whole episode, so...
我们必须让他演 we have to let him go.
我不知道安迪是否会接受 I'm not sure how Andy's gonna take this.
我们必须坚持并告诉他 We'll just have to go down and tell him.
可那是托尼 不是安迪 But-But that's Tony down there. It's not Andy.
我不管那是谁 我要解雇他 I don't give a fuck who that is. I'm gonna fire him.
好吧 Okay. All right.
但我们最好先警告安迪 But we better warn Andy first.
他决定在旧金山的音乐会 He's up in San Francisco doin' a concert.
我打电话叫我秘书 I'll call my secretary.
黛安 我是乔治 Diane, this is George.
- 我想接旧金山的安迪 - 好的 - I'm trying to reach Andy up in San Francisco. - Okay.
- 我给您转过去 - 我等着 - I'll patch you through. - I'll wait.
- 喂- 安迪 我把你的声音放在扬声器里 - Hello. - Andy, I'm gonna put you on the speaker.
- 你好 安迪 - 你好? - Hello, Andy. Hi. - Hello ?
- 我和埃德在一起 - 你好 埃德 - I'm here with Ed over at Taxi. - Hi, Ed.
- 你好 安迪 - 你好吗? - Hi, Andy. - How are you?
- 我很好 - 很好? - I'm fine. - Good.
- 安迪 托尼有点问题 - 不 - Andy, there's been some trouble with Tony. - Oh, no.
他受伤了? Did... Did he get hurt?
- 不是 - 安迪 不是像… 不 - No. - Andy, it's nothing like... No.
- 他伤害了别人? - 不 不是那样 - Did he hurt someone else? - No, no. It's not that.
安迪 我给你打电话是因为… Andy, uh, the reason I'm calling you like this...
我对你的艺术水平 表示崇高的敬意 is I have the utmost respect for your artistry.
我一直很欣赏 Well, may I say that I've always appreciated that, Ed.
谢谢你 但你知道 在这种情况下 Thank you, but you see, in this instance, um,
我必须得到 你的允许解雇托尼 I have to ask your permission to fire Tony.
我的允许 Oh, my.
乔治 这会要了托尼的命 George, this is gonna kill Tony.
- 他一生都在等这个机会 - 还会有别的角色 - He's waited for this his whole life. - There'll be other shots.
我们必须这样做 他是个很糟糕的演员 Yeah, we have to do this. He's just a terrible actor.
好的 但别刺激他 Okay, but please, let him down gently.
相信我们 Trust us.
他妈的 我不走 Fuck you! I'm not goin'!
我们有协议 We had a deal.
我不知道你跟谁说了 我没有跟任何人说 I don't know who you talked to. I didn't talk to anybody.
- 你一定跟别人说了！ - 我跟安迪·考夫曼说了 - You must have talked to someone else! - I was talkin' to Andy Kaufman!
- 我不认识安迪·考夫曼 - 好 - I don't know no Andy Kaufman! - Okay.
保安 进来！ Security, get in here!
保安 Security!
Aah.
不要伤害他 Don't hurt him!
- 他是个天才 - 我不想这个场景留下任何照片 - He's a talented man! - I don't want any pictures leaving this set.
嗨 给我！这是兹姆达！ 他是其中之一 Hey, give me that! This is Zmuda! He's one of 'em!
- 你们曾去过维加斯 - 去过 - You guys ever go to Vegas, - Yeah, yeah.
你们不要插手 you're not gettin' in!
嗨 回来 把照相机给我 Hey, come back! Give me the camera! Come here!
- 把照相机给我 - 什么? - Give me the camera! - What?
我付20元 听我的吩咐 I got 20 bucks says you work for me now!
我想用电话 I would like to use the phone!
- 不行 先生 - 洗个澡怎么样? 我要买短裤 - Not on the lot, sir. - How 'bout a bathroom? I may have shit my pants.
- 喝水?吃阿司匹林? - 都不行 - Drink of water? Aspirin? - Nope.
- 要条湿毛巾? - 不行 - Moist towelette? - No.
如果那样的话 就再见了 In that case, it has been an honor. "Good-bee"!
太好了 This is great!
真是太好了 老兄 This is too much, man.
它让托尼变成了真人 给了他三个评价 It makes Tony real, gives him three dimensions.
对他的事业有好处 乔治 It's good for his career, George.
真的? 你想看托尼·克利夫顿的表演吗? Oh, really? You wanna book Tony Clifton at Harrah's Tahoe.
我知道那个大学生 真的象安迪·考夫曼 I know the college kids really like Andy Kaufman.
不 不 象吉恩 让我把这个查清楚 No, no, no. L-Look, Gene, let me be really clear about this.
如果你约托尼 你就不希望得到安迪 If you book Tony, do not expect to get Andy.
好 好 我会抓住机会的 Yeah, yeah, well, I'll take my chances, all right?
好的 做我的客人 约他 All right. Be my guest. Book him.
闭嘴 Shut up!
你们都他妈的闭嘴 Shut the hell up, all of ya!
你你再出声 我就下去 把你们的头放进汤里 You make one more sound, I'll come down there and put your frickin' head in the soup!
Whew.
我喜欢完全安静 When I go like this, it means I-I expect total silence!
台上有个艺术家 There is an artiste on stage.
那样好多了 That's better.
Oh, whether I'm right
Or whether I'm wrong
Oh, whether I find a place in this world
Or never belong
I've got to be me
I've gotta be me
Willing to try to do it or die
Yaah! Hah! Aah!
啊? What?
谢谢大家 Thank you very much!
谢谢大家 我表演我的拿手绝活 Thank you. I do all my own stunts.
I've got to be
Eeee
Eeee-eee
发生了什么事? What the hell's goin' on?
考夫曼? Kaufman?
考夫曼在搅和我的表演 Kaufman's crappin' on my act!
考夫曼到底在说什么 Where's it say Kaufman's in the act?
借这个用一下? - May I borrow this for a second? - Oh, no.
不 No!
现在你全湿了? Ah, now you are all wet, huh?
你看起来象在那边喝酒了 You look like you could use a little drink up there.
为什么不继续呢 滚 Why don't you go on, get out of here!
为什么不脱衣服 考夫曼 Why don't you just take off, Kaufman!
走开 小鼓手 Get out of here, little drummer boy!
别走 Stay!
别走 安迪 回来 - I've got to be - Don't leave, Andy! Come back!
Eeee
- Go home! - Volare
Whoa-oh
Ca-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa wantare
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Uhh! Ah!
天哪 关门 关门 Jesus Christ. Close the goddamn door. Close it!
看看你 Oh. Look at you.
你太伟大了 You're so proud.
你象个从学校来的傻孩子… You're like some stupid kid who comes home from school...
"看 爸爸我得了‘F’" "Look, Dad, I got an 'F.'"
难道不好玩吗? But wasn't it funny?
"是的 很好玩" "Yes, it was funny, Andy. It was."
只有趣了一会儿 Yes, it was funny for a little while,
直到观众认出托尼不是你 until the audience realized that Tony wasn't you.
Oh. Mmm. Ohhh!
那么你们在这有什么? So what do you have here?
一个大的精心编制的玩笑 宇宙中只有你们两个有趣… A big, elaborate joke that's only funny to two people in the universe...
你和你 you and you.
是啊 乔治 我们都觉得很很搞笑 Yeah, sure, George, yeah, and we happen to think that it's hilarious.
但哪点好笑? 哪点好笑? But what's the point? What is the point?
很有趣 乔治 It's fun, George!
这怎么使你 成为世界上最红的明星呢 How is this gonna make you the biggest star in the world?
乔治…… George...
观众希望我一直让他们震惊 at this point the audience expects me to completely shock them all the time.
但除了假死和让剧院着火外 But short of faking my own death or setting the theater on fire,
我不知道还有别的什么 I don't know what else to do.
因为我总是走在他们前面一步 'Cause I've always gotta be one step ahead of them.
Whoa-ohh!
象芭蕾舞剧 It's like ballet. Whoa!
看见了吗? Did you see that?
打 Bam!
快有结果了 ...dropped to the canvas...
这些家伙很聪明 我想通过最坏的路成为摔交选手 These guys are brilliant. I wanna be a bad guy wrestler in the worst way.
我讨厌你摔交 问题是你不具备这种体格 I hate to break it to you, but the problem here is you don't have the build for it.
这些家伙都很高大 These guys are huge.
他们会踢你的屁股 They would kick your ass.
也许我可以捉弄比我小点的 Maybe I can pick on someone a little smaller than me.
不 不 女人在很多方面 都比男人有优势 No, no. Women are superior to men in many ways.
就是这佯 That's right.
- 当提到煮饭 做洁洁 洗土豆 - When it comes to cooking, cleaning, washing potatoes,
洗胡萝卜 照看孩子 scrubbing the carrots, making the babies,
擦地时 mopping the floors,
她们比男人占有优势 they have it all over men.
但提到摔交… But when it comes to wrestling...
住嘴 Shut up!
当一个人在讲话时 请保持安静 Be quiet when a man is talking!
如果有女人能站在 这证明我错了 If there is a woman here tonight who can come up here and prove me wrong,
我就闭上嘴 并给她500没有 I will shut my mouth and pay her $500.
我可以 I can do it!
这里 Right here!
第一个举手的先来 First come, first served!
过来 你想赢我吗 Come on! You wanna take me?
来这边 Come on up here.
- 亲爱的 你叫什么名字? - 赖尼 - What's your name, sweetheart? - Lynne.
赖尼 赖尼自愿上来了 Lynne. We got Lynne as a volunteer.
- 赖尼 注意了 - 你会很惨的！ - Lynne, sweetheart, pay attention. - You're pathetic!
我们看看 We'll see about that, Suzy Q
我不想踢 咬 抓 用头撞 明白吗？ I want no kicking, biting, scratching, head butts. Do you understand?
- 为什么? 他要规规矩矩比赛吗? - 我不关心他 - Why? He's gonna play fair? - lam not concerned with him.
- 他是个专业人员 - 不管怎样你要牵制我 - He is a professional. - It's up to you to pin me.
- 好 我明白了 - 很好 我们可以友好的握握手 - Yes, I understand. - Very good. Could we please shake hands.
Oooh!
听到铃声开始摔交 Come out wrestling when you hear the bell.
你们看见了吗? You see? You see this?
Yeah! Whoa!
我告诉过你 不死握着 Hey, no choke holds! I told you!
好 加油 Yeah! Come on!
Oww!
别打了 考夫曼 I said, break it up, Kaufman!
- 第一次警告 - 为什么? - First warning! - For what?
你拉她的头发 你不想有第二次警告吧 You pulled her hair! You won't be getting a second warning!
住嘴 Shut up!
我是冠军 女人败了… I am the champion! No woman can beat...
Ohh!
加油 - Ohh! - Come on! Ohh!
一！二！ One! Two!
三 好了 Three! That is it!
结束了 结束了 It is over! It is over! That is it!
你赢了你输了 You are out! You are down!
赢者毫无疑问的 赢得了世界摔交冠军 The winner and undisputed intergender wrestling champion of the world,
安迪·考夫曼 Andy Kaufman!
我是胜利者 I am the winner!
我有大脑 I've got the brains!
- 夫人 这是免费赠送给你的照片 - 谢谢 - Ma'am, here is your complimentary photo of Merv. - Thank you.
- 这是蜡海龟 - 我不想要蜡海龟 - And your Turtle Wax. - I don't want Turtle Wax.
每个客人都拿了蜡海龟 Every guest of Merv takes Turtle Wax.
- 这是吃红龙虾的礼券 - 非常感谢 - And here is your gift voucher to Red Lobster. - Thank you so much.
我只想谢谢你做了件伟大的事情 Hey, hey, hey. I just wanted to thank you for doing such a great job.
- 我真的很感激 - 不要夸我 - I really appreciate it. - Don't patronize me.
- 等等 - 什么事? - Wait, wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - What?
我希望你不要把刚才的事当真 I hope you don't take everything I did in there seriously.
只是演出的一部分 It's just part of the show.
就象狂欢节那些古老的日子… It's like the old days of the carnival barker...
当他让人群发怒时 when he'd get the crowd all riled up.
所以你假装成一个可恶的家伙 So you just pretend to be an asshole?
我很擅长这个 That's what I'm good at.
是 你是 Yeah, you are.
你是真的很厉宣 You are really, really good at it. You are.
莫维·格瑞菲收到了2000份讨厌的邮件 Merv Griffin got 2,000 pieces of hate mail.
别让我笑 乔治 Don't make me laugh, George.
安迪 莫维没收到讨厌的邮件 Andy, Merv does not get hate mail.
就是说我们成功了 That means we're a success.
Oh.
我们让房子有点生气 We got the room all worked up, like punk rock.
他们讨厌你 They detest you.
你下次出现时 女人会吹口哨的 The next time you make an appearance, women are gonna picket.
你觉得呢? Do you think so?
因为你没给她们任何提示 知识粗劣的模仿 Yes, because you have not given them any clues that this is a parody.
那是因为我只做一次 她们会习惯的 That's because I've only done it once. They'll get used to it.
因为我要反复的做… Because I'm gonna do it again and again...
一遍又一遍… - and again and again and again and again...
Oh, Rose Marie
I love you
I'm always dreaming
Of you
No matter what I do
- Aaah! - No matter what I do
I can't forget you
Sometimes I wish that I'd
Never met you
And yet if I
Should lose you
时间到了 Time out!
It would mean my very life
你怎么了? - What's your problem? - To me
好 你出去 All right, you are out of here!
Of all the queens that ever lived
I choose you
To rule me
两个大人 谢谢 - My Rose Marie - Two adults, please. Thank you.
- 想吃爆米花吗? - 不 谢谢 - You want some popcorn? - Um, no, thank you.
我很想吃 I really want one.
一袋爆花米 外加黄油 Um, a large tub of popcorn, please. Extra butter.
为什么给我打电话 我最不愿接到的电话就是你的 Why did you call me? You are the last person I expected to call me.
糟了… 赖尼 我是说… Gosh, uh... Gee, Lynne, I mean...
我对你的摔交动作 印象很深 I was just so impressed with your wrestling moves.
你对什么印象很深 Yeah, you're impressed with something.
- 你在国际电视上出了个大错 - 哦 老兄 - You had a huge boner on national television. - Oh, man!
- 是的 的确如此 - 过来 - Yes, you did! - Come on.
我把每件事都录下来了 I had it taped down and everything.
希望没有冒犯你 I hope I didn't offend you.
我在这不是吗? I'm here, aren't I?
想去孟斐斯结婚吗? Hey, wanna go to Memphis and get married?
我想去孟斐斯结婚吗? Do I wanna go to Memphis and get married?
- Mm-hmm. - Wh...
为什么是孟斐斯? Why Memphis?
因为孟斐斯是世界摔交王国 Because Memphis is the wrestling capital of the world.
我要走上拳击台… I'll get up in the ring...
我会宣布我要娶 第一个打败我的人 and I'll announce that I'll marry the first woman who beats me.
你起来 我们摔交 我让你赢… Then you can get up, we'll wrestle, I'll let you win...
- 你让我赢? - 我让你赢 我让你 - You'll let me win? - I'll let you win. I'll let you.
然后我们进行决赛 在大卫优秀运动员会上结婚 Then we'll run off and get married on the David Letterman show.
- 天哪 - 好吗? - God! - Okay?
答应吗? What do you say?
是真的吗? Is this for real?
别说话了！ - Shut up! - Boo!
别说话了 Shut up!
我讲话时要求大家安静 I demand silence when I am talking!
完全缺乏尊敬… Total lack of respect from Mr. Hollywood...
今晚如果有哪位女士想打败我 If there is one woman here tonight who thinks she can defeat me,
那位幸运的女士… that lucky little lady...
将同我结婚 will get to marry me!
什么样的男人会跟女士摔交? Let me ask you, folks... What kind of man would wrestle a woman anyway?
考夫曼 Kaufman!
考夫曼 - Kaufman! - Oooh.
我要摔赢你 无用的家伙 - Whoo! - I'll take you on, you sissy.
这个小女士紧张了 Whoa! The little lady is upset!
让我告诉你 宝贝 Well, let me tell you something, baby.
在你受伤前 还是回厨房去吧 Go back to the kitchen where you belong before you get hurt.
你要进厨房 因为我要你成为我的器皿 You get in the kitchen, 'cause I'm gonna make you do my dishes!
住手 住手 Hey! Stop it! Stop it!
这个女人是假装的 This woman is a fake!
她是安迪·考夫曼的女朋友 She's nothing more than Andy Kaufman's girlfriend.
什么?你在怎么解释 What? Well, there you go.
那不是真的 That's not true! That's not true!
骗子 Faker!
- 这不是真的 - 是真的 这是个计划 - That is not true! - Oh, yeah, that's true. This is all a setup.
我不会允许你欺骗这么多人 I'm not gonna allow you to make fools out of all these people.
你到底是什么人? Who the hell are you?
我叫杰尔·洛勒 是孟斐斯的摔交王子 I'm Jerry Lawler, the king of Memphis wrestling!
他是王子 He's the King.
嗨 考夫曼 Hey, Kaufman,
如果你想跟人摔交 if you wanna wrestle somebody,
我给你找个真正的摔交手来 I brought a real wrestler.
她是经过训练的 有准备的 She's trained, and she's ready!
让我们看看你 是否能控制弗克斯·杰克逊 Let's see if you can handle Foxy Jackson!
Oh, my!
弗克斯·杰克逊和安迪·考夫曼都在这 一对一挑战 Foxy Jackson and Andy Kaufman right here, one-on-one!
我不同意这样做 我不会答应的 I never agreed to this! I will not do this!
洛勒 我不同意这么做 这是违背规则的 Lawler, I did not agree to this. This is against the rules!
我想是安迪·考夫曼对弗克斯·杰克逊没准备 I don't think that Kaufman is prepared for Foxy Jackson.
- 提他的屁股！ - 好莱坞先生 - Kick his butt! - Mr. Hollywood.
安迪·考夫曼再次显出 完全没自信的神情 Again, Kaufman showing a total lack of respect.
弗克斯·杰克逊把安迪·考夫曼带到赛场上 Foxy Jackson's gonna take Kaufman to the woodshed, folks.
安迪·考夫曼 像个小男孩挂在绳子上 Kaufman's hangin' on the ropes like a little baby.
弗克斯就要拉掉考夫曼的短裤 Foxy's about to take Kaufman right out of his shorts!
- 一 二… - 相信了吗? - One, two... - Can you believe it?
- 我抓住她了！ - 放开她 - I got her! - Get off of her!
快点放开她 Get him off of her. Come on!
王子来了 Now there goes the King.
王子把考夫曼像洋娃娃一样扔在地上 Oh, the King just threw Kaufman down like a rag doll!
王子轻而易举的就占了上风 The King took matters into his own hands!
你在干什么 What are you doing?
我不和男人摔交 I do not wrestle men!
我要控告你 洛勒 I am gonna sue you, Lawler!
我是全国的电视明星 I am a national TV star,
我讨厌你们这些愚蠢的家伙… and I don't like dumb, stupid crackers...
在拳击场把我推来推去 coming in the ring, pushing me around!
我不想跟你摔交 我不想 I did not agree to wrestle you! I did not agree!
这是攻击 殴打 This is assault and battery,
我有很多律师会控告你… and I'm gonna get a team of lawyers to sue you...
和你的子子孙孙 and your children and your children's children.
告诉你 考夫曼 Let me tell you something, Kaufman.
摔交对我来说是项很严肃的运动 Wrestling's a very serious sport to me,
我不喜欢 象你这样的人拿它来取乐 and I don't appreciate some jerk like you trying to make fun of it.
我不允许象你这样的人 试图用它来作弄从南方来的人 And I certainly don't appreciate a jerk like you trying to make fun of people from the South!
那么我们在法庭上见 So we can go to court,
or you can get in the ring with a man and wrestle for real!
你想跟我摔交吗? Oh, you wanna "rassle" me?
你想跟我来孟斐斯风格的 You wanna "rassle" me Memphis style?
我告诉你 洛勒… 我强烈要求你手下留情 Well, let me tell you something, Mr. Lawler... I am gonna make you scream for mercy!
过来 考夫曼 Come on, Kaufman!
他们不知道什么打得他们 They didn't know what hit them! Oh!
是演戏吗? 是演戏吗? Is it an act? Is it an act?
或是你喜欢制造麻烦? Or are you just addicted to causing trouble?
或宝贝 只要我喜欢随时可以退出 I can quit anytime I want, baby!
你知道什么? 我不是支柱 You know what? I'm not a prop.
别再对我那佯 Don't ever treat me like that again.
对不起 嗨 嗨 I'm sorry. Hey. Hey.
我只是着急了 没别的意思 Uh, I just get caught up, that's all.
有时我会失控的 Sometimes I get lost.
安迪 别再摔交了 Please, Andy, enough with the wrestling.
你认为我赢不了他? You don't think I can beat him?
他是南方的重量级拳击冠军 他会杀了你的 He's the Southern heavyweight champion. He'll kill you.
我不知道 I don't know.
我和比他高大的女人都摔过交 我可以用他们来拖地 I've wrestled women bigger than him, and I've mopped the floor with them.
你首先要打败女人 然后你就打败南方 First you piss off women. Then you piss off the South.
你就被杀了 而我已经定了演唱会 Then you get killed, and I did the booking.
好笑 Funny.
我希望你能接受这项工作 Listen, I got this job that I want you to take.
是每个星期五的电视秀 It's guest-hosting the TV show Fridays.
不是很好可对你有好处 It's not a great TV show, but it'll be good for you.
是实况转播的 他们会全权委托你… It's live, they'll give you carte blanche...
你又可以让人们大笑了 and you get back in the business of making people laugh.
- 你说是实况转播? - 实况转播 - You said live? - Live.
我不会幽默 I don't do drug humor.
安迪 那是整个节目的需要 Andy, it's fine. This is what the show is all about.
年轻人喜欢这种素材 Kids love this stuff.
我不会吸毒 我也不会轻视他们 I don't do drugs, and I don't enjoy making light of them.
你们不是答应我创造性的调节吗 I was promised creative control.
没人答应你创造性的调节 Nobody promised you creative control.
三天前我就给你剧本了 到今天你没说一句话 I got you the script three days ago, and you haven't said a damn word until today.
几分钟后 就要实况转播了 太迟了 We're going live in a few minutes. It's too late.
走 让观众进来 Let's go! Bring the audience in!
从洛杉矾来的实况转播 - 詹尼斯 开始了 - Live from the Los Angeles Basin, - Janice, it 's on!
现在是每周星期五 it 's Fridays!
特别嘉宾: 安迪·考夫曼 Andy Kaufman!
这个画面里 两对已婚的夫妇出去吃饭 In this sketch, two married couples are out to dinner.
每个人都秘密的带了块肉 Everybody has secretly brought along a joint.
卡尔是最后一个 鬼鬼祟祟进入浴室的人 Carl was the last one to sneak to the bathroom to get a little high,
现在他返回餐桌 and now he's coming back to the table.
一千元 饭店的东西太贵了 不是吗 Gee, restaurants are amazing, aren't they?
周围的人都面无表情 Strangers sitting around, stuffing dead animals into their faces.
真是难以置信? It's incredible, isn't it?
是啊 一千元 Yeah, gee,
并且…卫生间… and... the bathrooms...
是…如此…华丽… are... so... colorful...
你没事吧… 卡尔? Everything okay... Carl?
对不起 我… 我只是… 不能做 I'm sorry. I... I just... can't do it.
我… 我不能太兴奋了 I... I can't play stoned.
看提示性卡片 Read the cue cards.
我不能太兴奋了 I can't play stoned.
我… 我感觉… 很傻 I... I feel... stupid.
你感觉很傻? 我们呢? You feel stupid? What about us?
对不起 I'm sorry.
对不起 - I'm sorry.
安迪 Andy.
你没必要那样做 You didn't have to do that.
住手 Cut it out!
你这个笨蛋 Oh... You jerk!
好了 现在继续广告节目 Okay, that's it. Go to commercial now.
- 我告诉你我不想演这个场景 - 考夫曼 离开我的舞台 - I told you I didn't want to do this sketch. - Kaufman, get off my stage.
别碰我 疯子 Don't you touch me! You're a nut!
- 别打架 - 疯子 - Break it up! - A nut!
安静 Settle down.
安迪为什么要那样做 Oh, why does Andy do that? Why? Why?
我开始用娴雅 … I started using Suave...
我们应该继续广告节目 We've gone to commercial!
- 对不起 - ABC开除你了 - Excuse me! - You're never gonna work at ABC again!
女士们 先生们 请原谅 Excuse me! Ladies and gentlemen, please.
你们刚才看到的是场意外 You have all just participated in a happening.
Oh!
你们知道 Now, okay, you know,
为了逼真 台下有人可能知道 可能不知道 to make it real, some of you down there knew what was going on and some of you didn't.
但我们不想扰乱在家的人 But we don't want to upset the folks at home,
所以安迪会告诉 他们这只是个闹剧 so now Andy is going to tell them that it was all just a prank.
不要广告了… Coming back from commercial, and...
在广告中 During the commercials,
ABC的人委托我向你们解释一下… the people at ABC told me to explain to you...
整个的打架事件都是在演戏 that this whole fight episode was staged.
- 哦 好啊 - 这是假的 - Oh, good. - It's a lie!
只是骗局而已 It's a cover-up!
我不明白 你们为什么笑? 我现在不好笑了呀 Why are you laughing? I don't understand. I'm not being funny now.
你们见到的是真的 What you saw was real!
这些是总是在网上发生 No, these... these things happen all the time at the networks, only they cut away.
- 剪掉广告 - 你们看? - Cut to commercial. - You see?
你们看? You see?
他们一定会解雇我 如果你们想再见我 就到孟斐斯来 For sure they're gonna fire me, so if you want to see me again you'll have to come to Memphis...
孟斐斯有什么? - Ho ho ho Green Giant - What's in Memphis?
巨大的诱惑力让你… The Giant's flavor-tight pouch Lets you...
那家伙完全失常 That kid is totally meshuga.
杰尔·洛勒 Jerry Lawler!
来自田纳西州孟斐斯的… The most popular athlete...
最受欢迎的运动员 in the history of Memphis, Tennessee,
走进拳击场 stepping inside a squared circle.
重236磅 At 236 pounds,
杰尔·洛勒王子 Jerry "The King" Lawler!
介绍 "March And Fanfare"] - And introducing,
191磅 at 191 pounds,
世界冠军获得者 the holder of the world intergender championship,
安迪·考夫曼来了 here is Andy Kaufman!
你们可以听到 大家对安迪·考夫曼欢呼声 You can hear the ovation, or lack of one, for Andy Kaufman.
欢呼变成了嘲讽 The cheers turned to jeers.
洛勒会为我们每个人讨回公道 Lawler is gonna settle a score for each and every one of us,
因为我们都受了 来自好莱坞可怕的安迪·考夫曼的羞辱 because we've all been insulted by this hideous Andy Kaufman from Hollywood, California.
裁判员安排的这次较量… - The referee assigned to this bout...
我们比赛前 Before we begin this event,
我想跟你们讲几件事 让你们感到恶心 I just want to say a couple of things to you disgusting people!
那是不对的 Oh, come on. That's just not right.
你们听吗? Are you listening to me?
好 Okay!
各位 Ladies and gentlemen,
这是一块肥皂 this is a bar of soap.
跟我说 Say it with me.
肥皂 "Soap."
你们要做的是打湿肥皂… All you have to do is wet this bar of soap...
用它擦你的手… and wipe your hands with it...
擦你的身体 and rub it on your body,
不久那专人厌恶的脏东西就清除了 and soon that disgusting, filthy dirt will come off!
他为什么说这些? Why is he saying these things?
他只是想引起观众的兴趣 激怒他们 He's just engaging the audience. He's riling them up.
他们就会中伤他 They are going to lynch him.
第二件事 And now for lesson two!
这是卫生纸！ This is toilet paper!
天哪 Oh, good grief!
你只是… - You just...
告诉你考夫曼… 我们受够了你的废话！ I'm gonna tell you something, Kaufman... we've had enough of your crap!
我们做该做的事吧 马上摔交 Let's do what we came here to do. Let's wrestle right now!
开始吧 王子已经准备好了 Well, here we go. The King is ready.
为了考夫曼好 我希望他准备好了 And I hope, for Kaufman's sake, he's ready.
杰尔 杰尔 杰尔 Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!
考夫曼把摔交归功于拳击场 Kaufman's due a trip to the old woodshed here.
我没想过我会看到这天… Now, I never thought I'd see the day that...
看考夫曼 Yeah, look at Kaufman.
考夫曼不想 沾到洛勒的任何地方 Yeah, Kaufman doesn't want any part of Lawler.
对人性来说他完全很难堪 他来自好莱坞 He's an absolute embarrassment to humanity, this man from Hollywood.
你们知道吗? 我来自好莱坞 You see? I am from Hollywood!
- 谁在乎? - 我有智力 - Who cares? - I have the brains!
没人在乎你来自哪里 Nobody cares where you're from!
我是王子 我是王子 I'm the king I'm the king
我是孟斐斯王子 I'm the king of Memphis, Tennessee
安迪 我们回家 Andy, please, let's go home!
别担心 妈妈 我会让你骄傲的 Don't worry, Mom. I'll make you proud.
考夫曼被什么东西打了一下 - Whoa, whoa, whoa! - Uh-oh, Kaufman got nailed with something.
- 有拳击迷在扔东西 - 谁干的? - Some fan threw something. - Who did that?
谁干的? Who did that?
- 你们不能碰我 我会控告你！ - 嗨 考夫曼 - You cannot touch me! I will sue you! - Hey, Kaufman!
- 我一天挣的钱比你们… - 考夫曼 - I make more money in one day than you do... - Kaufman!
一生赚的钱还多！ in your entire lives combined!
考夫曼 Kaufman!
来摔交或者象笨驴一样表演? Did you come down here to wrestle or act like an ass?
上来 我教你免费的摔交法?来呀 Now get in the ring. I'll give you a free headlock. Okay? Come on!
洛勒好象很乐意提供免费的方法 Lawler seems to be willing to offer a free hold of some kind.
算了吧 安迪 No, no. Drop it now, Andy!
没事的 没事 It's okay! It's okay!
让考夫曼上去 让我们看看他到底有多大本事 Let Kaufman get in there, and let's see what kind of man he is.
一 二 三… One, two, three...
我不相信王子会坚持到最后 - I can't believe that the King is gonna go through with this.
大嘴的王八蛋会得到免费的摔交法 That big-mouth son of a gun has got a free headlock!
就要看到了 Business may pick up here.
我把他抓住了 这是真的 I did it! This is for real!
当心 考夫曼 Uh-oh. Oh, look out, Kaufman!
哎呀 他在那 Oh, there he goes! Oh, my!
考夫曼有麻烦了 Kaufman in trouble!
当心 当心 Look out! Look out!
王子把他折起来了 就像折手风琴一样 The King folded him up like an accordion that time.
王子问人们… Now the King is asking this crowd...
他们是否想见识打桩机 if they want to see the pile driver.
那是不合规定的 That's illegal.
考夫曼陷入困境 Kaufman is out of it!
哎呀 哎呀 Oh, my! Oh, my!
- 就要成为打桩机了 It's gonna be a pile driver!
在那 There it is!
安迪 Oh! Andy!
他受重伤了 He's hurt bad.
- 无意识被剥夺了资格 - 洛勒 你… - That's an automatic disqualification right there. - Lawler, you...
考夫曼赢了 但此时他看起来不像胜利者 Well, Kaufman wins it, but he doesn't look like a winner right now.
- 快点！ - 让开 让开 - Come on! - Keep it clear. Keep it clear.
- 嗨 乔治 - 嗨 洛恩 - Hey, George. - Hey, Lorne.
- 谢谢你在这么短的时间来见我 - 哦 请坐 - Thanks for seeing me on such short notice. - Oh, please.
我想跟你谈谈 Right, I wanted to talk to you about, uh,
关于把安迪再安排到 星期六夜生活节目中 putting Andy back on Saturday Night Live.
我不知道是否还留他在节目中 I don't know whether Andy works on the show anymore.
我是说那个摔交事件 - I mean, the wrestling stuff is... - Yeah, yeah.
- 这太糟了… - - 摔交… - Just, I think it's worn... - The wres...
我们都完全同意摔交 Yeah, we all agree, uh, completely about the wrestling.
那很好啊 That's smart.
是啊… Yeah, uh...
- 安迪非常的诚恳 - 是的 - Andy is very sincere. - Right.
他要向杰尔·洛勒道歉 向他做的恶作剧忏悔 He's gonna apologize to Jerry Lawler and repent for all his bad guy shenanigans.
我向所有与我 摔过的交运动员道歉 I apologize for all the wrestling I've ever done.
我对我造成的伤害道歉 I'm sorry for all the grief I've ever given.
我只是在戏弄坏摔交运动员 我不是故意的 I was just playing bad guy wrestler, you know. It's just a role. It's not me.
我想杰尔 So, I guess Jerry just, um,
亲自接受道歉 um, took it personally.
我是说你说了一些煽动性的东西 Yeah, but, uh, I mean, you said some pretty inflammatory things.
对他来说什么都是玩笑 就象那 Right. Everything's a joke to this guy. Just like that thing.
- 我不知道是脖撑圈还是跳蚤领 - 那不是真的 - I don't know if that's a neck brace or a flea collar. - That's not true.
这是真的 我去过医院 This is serious. I went to the hospital.
我在医院呆了三天 I was in the hospital three days, in traction.
我还告诉你们 I'll tell you something else.
我爸爸说我可以雇律师 告你们对我做的一切 My father said I could've hired a lawyer and sued you for everything you've got.
但我没有 我不是那种人 But I didn't because I'm not that kind of guy.
你是什么样的人 What kind of guy are you?
告诉你什么… 也许我要叫个律师来 Tell you what... I think maybe I'll get a lawyer here.
如果你是人 你就马上向我道歉 If you were a man, you'd apologize to me right now.
但你只是个贫穷的白人 But you're just poor white trash,
我想那对你来说已经是厚待了 so I guess that's too lofty a concept for you.
你要做什么… I mean, what are you gonna do...
你没事吧 Are we, uh... Is everything... Are you okay? Huh?
我讨厌这种把戏 洛勒 This... I'm sick of this shit, Lawler.
我发誓 我要控告你对我做的一切 I'm gonna sue you for everything you've got, I swear to God.
你混蛋 洛勒? Fuck you! Okay? Okay, Lawler?
肏你妈！ 对不起 戴夫 Fuck you! I'm sorry, Dave.
我知道我不能 在电视上说这些话 I know I'm not supposed to say those things on television.
我道歉 对不起 对不起 I apologize. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
但你不是东西 But you, you are a m-ing -hole!
好了? Okay?
Well...
- Well...
I, uh...
我觉得你要在电视上说几句话 I, I think you can use some of those words on television,
你不能就这样泼咖啡 but what you can't do is throw coffee.
星期六夜生活的很多人… Some of us at Saturday Night Live...
认为安迪是个喜剧天才 think Andy Kaufman's a comic genius.
但还有一些不这样认为 But others disagree.
他们说他不再搞笑了 They say he's just not funny anymore.
所以我们把 这个决定权留给你们 So we're leaving the decision up to you.
留他的请拨电话l- 900- 555- 76l8 To keep Andy, call 1-900-555-7618.
不留的 … To dump him...
真糟 This is bad.
我只有百分之28的选票 I, um, only got 28%.
星期六夜生活 是最受欢迎的节目 This is Saturday Night Live, the hippest audience in television.
他们都很喜欢你 They turned on you.
这样说我很难过 Look, it pains me to say this,
我认为你们两个 不应再在一起工作 but I don't think you two guys should ever work together again.
对不起 乔治 我们认为这只是好笑而已 I'm sorry, George. We just thought it was funny.
你不必抱歉 杰尔 You don't have to be sorry, Jerry.
你很优秀 You're... You're terrific.
你是最好的 You're just the best.
我不会把它当作买卖的 I wouldn't have traded it for anything.
对我来说这是光荣的时刻 To me, this was a shining moment for wrestling.
我也是 Me too. And...
对行为科学家来说 是光荣的时刻 And it was a shining moment for behavioral science.
为什么我们不来的了断呢 Hey, well... But why can't I make a gag out of this?
也许我们可以回到电视… I mean, maybe I could go on the show and I could say...
那是非法的 我要做个澄清 it was rigged and I demand a recount.
安迪 你不明白 Andy, you don't understand.
他们不想你回去了 They don't want you back.
现在闭上你们的眼睛 Now close your eyes.
如果世上的杂念进入你们的头脑 不要被他们所干扰 If the thoughts of this world come into your head, don't be upset by them.
努力把他们赶走 It's just your stress unraveling itself.
然后再回到祷告 Just slowly come back to the mantra.
安迪 Andy?
过来? Please?
继续静思 我马上回来 Just continue your meditation. I'll be back.
- Jai Guru Dev. - Jai Guru Dev.
嗨 安迪 Hi, Andy.
嗨 Hi.
这个 This is, uh,
我很难说出口 very difficult for me to say.
可我们… Uh, but we...
我们觉得这是最好的… we feel that it's best...
如果你不加入静修 if you don't attend the retreat.
为什么? Why?
我每年都去静修 I go to the retreat every year.
我知道 安迪 Oh, I know, Andy,
我们不怀疑 你对超凡静思的热爱 and we don't doubt your devotion to Transcendental Meditation.
我们认为你应该和节目… It's just that we feel that, well, you and the program...
联系起来… have, uh, g-grown apart, uh...
联系 Philosophically.
"联系"? 什么是"联系"? "Philosophically"? What's "philosophically"?
安迪 摔交 男性至上主义的评论 粗鄙的语言 Well, Andy, the wrestling, the sexist remarks, the foul language,
他们不是精神启化的个人主义 they're just not becoming of an individual of spiritual enlightenment.
好象你对什么都不在意 It seems you just don't respect anything.
当然是的 Of course I do.
我只是认为世界是个幻想 I just... I think of the world as, as an illusion,
我们不应该太认真了 and we shouldn't take ourselves so seriously.
不要 Don't...
请 Don't,
不要 please,
参加这 do this.
你们让我加入这些组织 不是想要我平静吗 You've got to let me attend these classes. It's what keeps me balanced.
显然没效啊 I-It's apparently not working.
那么 帮帮我 帮帮我 好吗? Then, then help me. Help me, okay? Guide me.
安迪 Andy...
我们只是不希望你在这出现 we just don't wish your presence here.
嗨 Hi.
我给你带来了好吃的 I brought you some Haagen-Dazs.
我不值得你给我带吃的 I don't deserve Haagen-Dazs.
我是个坏男人 I'm... I'm a badperson.
哦 Oh.
你不坏 You aren't a bad person.
你是个很复杂的人 You are a complicated person.
你不了解真正的我 You don't know the real me.
没有真正的你 There isn't a real you.
是啊 我忘了 Oh, yeah. I forgot.
宝贝 Baby.
你跟我一起生活吗? Do you want to move in with me?
什么? What?
再说一遍 Say it again.
哦 罗斯 Oh, Rose
玛丽 Marie
我爱你 I love you
我总是 I'm always
梦见你 Dreaming of you
我去接 I'll get it.
考夫曼和玛盖尔性别研究中心 Kaufman and Marguiles Center for Sexual Research.
安迪 我是乔治 Andy, it's George.
嗨 乔治 我可能帮你了你什么 Hey, George. I'm not sure we can do anything for you.
安迪,我得到了不幸的消息 Yeah. Uh, Andy, uh, I got some crummy news.
哦 Oh.
汽车演出被取消 Taxi's been canceled.
不幸的消息? And the crummy news?
过来,我们谈谈好吗? Do you want me to come over, we'll talk about it?
不行,现在我可以说是很忙 Um, no. I'm sorta busy right now.
那么下星期见 I'll see you next week, though.
谢谢 Thanks.
放在那 Put it right there.
讨厌 Yuck.
女士们,先生们,晚会开始 And now, ladies and gentlemen, a treat for staying late,
欢迎从出租车表演上 来的安迪·考夫曼先生 please welcome, from Taxi, the Improv's own Mr. Andy Kaufman!
其实,你们错了 Actually, Bud, you're wrong.
今天发现 出租车表演被取消了 I found out today that Taxi has been canceled.
什么 What?
不是我妻子不许我来 Not to mention that my wife left me,
她是开玩笑 and she took the kids.
我不知道你们为什么笑 我不是开玩笑 I don't understand why you're laughing. I'm not joking.
今天早上我起来发现我有 And then this morning I got up and I noticed that I have, um,
一个胞或者是疖子… a cyst or some kind of boil...
在我的后脖子上 on the back of my neck.
看 Look.
看见了吗 See?
所以我在想 由于我还不是很痛 So I was thinking, since I'm still kind of a quasi-celebrity,
也许我能让 你们触摸一下我的胸 that maybe I could charge people to touch it.
有人愿意出一美元 摸我的胸吗? Would anybody like to pay a dollar to touch my cyst?
我是认真的 现在我真的很需要钱 I'm serious. I could really use the money right now.
这是个很好的交易 It 's a good deal.
好的 Oh, okay.
等等,你先付钱 Oh, wait, no. You gotta pay first.
一美元… It 's a dollar...
摸名人的胞 to touch my celebrity cyst.
好的 Okay.
Oww!
- 谢谢 - 不客气 - Thank you. - You're welcome.
非常感谢 Thank you very much.
安迪你告诉我们… W-Would Andy like to tell us...
为什么在凌晨4点 叫我们出来 why he called us out at 4:00 in the morning?
Um...
好的 yeah.
我得了癌症 Uh, I have cancer.
别闹了,别闹了 Forget it. Forget it!
那是很可怕听闻 - That is... That is in terrible taste.
我可不想与这有关 I don't wanna have anything to do with this. Nothing.
不,不,不,这很好 我们可以写这个剧本 No, no, no, that's good. We can make that play.
我们只是把它说出来? Okay, and we'll really... We'll just drag it out. All right?
你好了,又变坏了 Y- You get better, you get worse.
你死了,然后又活了 No, you die, and then, uh, you come back to life.
很好笑 That's funny.
很好笑 That's funny,
不是假的,鲍勃 but, um, it's not a gag, Bob.
我得了癌症 是肺癌 I got cancer. I got lung cancer.
肺癌 Lung cancer.
真荒谬,你有不抽烟 That's ridiculous. You don't even smoke.
我得的是奇怪的症状 I've got some freaky rare kind.
医学上叫大细胞癌 It's called large-celled carcinoma.
Yea!
我是个幸运的家伙 I'm a lucky guy.
- 又告诉家人吗? - 没有 - Have you told your family? - No. No.
我不想告诉他们 I don't want to tell them.
我已经麻烦… I've just...
他们很多了 jerked them around so much.
安迪,看着我的眼睛… Andy, look in my eye...
告诉我这是真的 and tell me this is true.
对不起 I'm sorry.
- 对不起,对不起 - 嗨 - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - Hey.
对不起 I'm sorry.
赖尼?等等,嗨,嗨,嗨 Lynne? Come on. Hey. Hey, hey.
等等 Wait up.
如果我发现 是你在后面操纵 我就杀了你 If I find out that you're behind this, I'll kill you, Zmuda!
你到底在说什么,乔治? What the hell are you talkin' about, George?
我不是说我不相信他 I was the one who just said I didn't believe him.
你们两个合起来骗我 That's just the kind of thing you two would work out to fuck me up.
你想知道事实吗,孩子 Man] We want the truth, boy!
爸爸说莱西咬我 我也说是她干的 My father said Lassie bit me, so I said she did too.
- 莱西不会要你 知道吗 - 散庭 - Lassie never bit you, and you know it. - Case dismissed!
Dramatic]
爸爸? Dad?
癌细胞已经进入了安迪的肺部… The cancer started in Andy's lungs...
扩展到他的左臂 and spread to his left arm.
我们采取了侵略性的放射治疗 We've initiated an aggressive radiation program.
- 看看是否能够根除受感染的细胞 - 沙利文医生 一线有电话找 - See if we can eradicate the affected cells. - Dr. Sullivan, line one.
对不起,失陪一会儿 Excuse me. I'll be right back.
胡说八道 What a crock.
你怎么能轻视呢? How dare you make light of this?
当我看到他的坏脖子时 我哭了 他再也不能感动我了 I cried when he broke his neck. He's not getting me again.
天哪,卡罗尔,他得了癌症 Jesus Christ, Carol, he's got lung cancer.
他想让我们焦头烂耳 He wants us scratching our heads,
问我们自己"这是真的吗?" asking ourselves, "Is this real?"
当然是真的,我们在医院 Of course it 's real. We 're in a hospital.
妈妈,这是雪松医科学校 Mom, it 's Cedars-Sinai.
这是实习医院 It's a show biz hospital.
安迪工作室的朋友 可能掌管这个地方 Andy's studio friends, they probably run this place.
他策划了这些事 并雇了演员 He plans these things. He takes over and hires actors.
我个人来讲 医生的话没有说服力 Personally, I don't think that doctor guy was very convincing.
- 他穿错了鞋 - 他穿的甚至不是医生鞋 - His costume had the wrong shoes. - Didn't even have doctor shoes.
不,不,不,一派胡言 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's bullshit.
不要相信考夫曼的谎言 他骗了我们很多次 No more Kaufman stories. He's burned us too many times.
可靠消息告诉我 他确实得了癌症 A very reliable source told me Andy Kaufman has lung cancer.
别说了,他不会死的 Oh, please. He's definitely not dying.
现在大白细胞正在袭击癌细胞 Now those big white cells are attacking the cancer cells.
袭击 Attacking.
我看见了,我看见了白细胞 I see them. I see the white cells.
- 袭击 - 袭击 - Attacking. - Attacking.
他是个演员 He's an actor.
我从他服饰上认出来的 I-I recognize him from The In-Laws.
是啊 Yeah. That's true.
他也是正个医学受命的 But he's also ordained in holistic medicine.
Oh.
乔治,我应该怎么做? George, what am I supposed to do?
我病了 我想好起来 可他们都以为我在开玩笑 I'm sick and I'm trying to get better, but everybody's looking at me funny.
我好象被一种 负面情绪所包围着 I feel like I'm being surrounded by negative energy.
是你自己所造成的局面 You're surrounded by what you create.
- 好笑 - 安迪,你是负面情绪的制造者 - Great. - Andy, you're the king of negative energy.
- 这必须停止 - 安迪 - And it's gotta stop. - Andy.
如果这些负面因素传出去 'Cause if these negative vibes get out,
每个人都会谈论我有多严重 everybody's gonna be talking about how sick I am,
变成了一种本身 自然会实现的预言 and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
我怎么帮你? How can I help you?
我想回去工作 I wanna go back to work.
- 你想在俱乐部巡回演出? - 不 不是俱乐部 - You wanna tour the clubs? - No. No clubs.
我想到最上等的地方 I wanna reach the top.
卡内基音乐堂! Carnegie Hall!
我想把这个演播间修建 I want this show to build and build.
我想让它成为 世上最大的演播间 I want it to be everything that's joyful in the world piled one on top of the other,
直到观众坐不下 带着他们的孩子在我面前 until the audience can't stand it and they turn into children right in front of me.
- 我甚至可以有圣诞老人 - 是 - I might even have Santa Claus. - Oh, yeah.
你可以说,今年圣诞节我有什么礼物?" You can say, "Santa, what am I getting for Christmas this year?"
- 他说"癌症" - 不,那… - And he says "Cancer." - No, that...
不 那… 我不要那样做 那太糟糕了 No, that's... I don't wanna do that. That's a bummer.
好,正经点,正经点,好… Uh, okay, positive, positive. Okay...
看,这真的是… Look, this is really, um, great...
- 圣诞老人和雪… - 是的 - Santa and snow and... - Yeah.
会化很多的钱 But it's gonna cost a fortune.
别担心,没问题 That's okay. Not a problem.
- 那么谁付钱呢 安迪? - 托尼·克利夫顿 - Well, who's gonna pay for it, Andy? - Tony Clifton.
Oh.
安迪 你知道 托尼没那么多钱 Andy, you know, Tony doesn't have that kind of money.
别担心,乔治 Don't you worry about that, George.
我比你了解托尼 他再工作十年就可以付清了 I know Tony better than you do, and even if he has to work another ten years to pay it off,
他会的 he'll do it.
Abu-dabi Abi-dabu-ah
Abi-dabi-dabu-eh
- Abu-day - Abu-day
- A-ki-chay-wah - A-ki-chay-wah
- Yaken-bu-day - Yaken-bu-day
- Ichen-di-bich - Ichen-di-bich
Yaki-di-shika-tala- ga-bola-ga-deba-ga-dili- ga-bohhhhhhhhhhhh
Ohhhhhhhhhh
Abu-dabi Abi-dabu-ah
I got spurs that jingle-j angle-j ingle
As I go ridin' merrily along
And they sing Oh, ain't you glad you're single
女士们,先生们 Ladies and gentlemen,
这是个幸福的夜 we are so very fortunate tonight,
因为我们和… because we have with us...
l931年出道电影界 现在仍健在的女牛仔一起共度今宵 the last surviving cowgirl from that 1931 film.
她今年94高寿 She's 94 years young.
埃莉诺·科迪·古尔德 Eleanor Cody Gould.
- I got spurs that jingle-jangle-jingle
As I go ridin' merrily along
你好 埃莉诺 你来这真是太好了 这是我们的荣幸 Hi, Eleanor. It's great to have you here. It's a real honor.
谢谢你 安迪 我很高兴来这 对我来说真是太激动了 Thank you, Andy. I'm delighted to be here. It's overwhelming to me.
还有更好的事 Well, it 's gonna get even better,
因为我们从您的电影里找到了一匹原始马 because we found one of the old original hobby horses from your movie.
你能为我们表演一下吗 Do you think you could grace us with a couple of steps from "Jingle, Jangle, Jingle"?
- 好的… - 好,开始 - Oh, I don't think... - Okay, hit it!
"Jingle, Jangle, Jingle"]
快点,来 Faster! Come on!
快点,快点 Faster! Faster!
快点,来 Faster! Come on!
快点!快点!快点! Faster! Faster! Faster!
快点! Faster!
Oh!
安迪,停下 安迪 Andy, stop! Andy!
现场有医生吗?音乐停下 Is there a doctor in the house? Stop the music!
我们需要医生 ... Uh, we need a doctor.
有吗?请上来 Anyone? Please?
你可以叫我们叫救护车? Can you call us an ambulance?
感谢上帝 Praise the Lord!
她活了,哈利路亚 She's alive! Hallelujah!
Hallelujah
Hallelujah Hallelujah
Hallelujah
女士们,先生们 Ladies and gentlemen, the Mormon Tabernacle Choir!
Here comes Santa Claus Here comes Santa Claus
天啦 - Right down Santa Claus lane - Oh, my gosh!
简直不敢相信 - Vixen and Blitzen and all his reindeer - I can't believe this!
太精彩了 It's the Rockettes!
Are pulling on the reins
Bells are ringing Children singing
All is merry and bright
Hang your stocking and say your prayers
'Cause Santa Claus comes tonight
孩子们,你们不会相信 - Here comes Santa Claus - Boys and girls, you're not gonna believe this!
圣诞老人来了 Here comes Santa Claus!
He's got a bag that's filled with toys
For the boys and girls again
Hear those sleigh bells jingle-jangle
What a beautiful sight
Jump in bed Cover up your head
因为你们都是好孩子 Since you've all been such good boys and girls,
我要带所有的观众出去… I would like to take everybody in this entire audience out...
喝牛奶吃点心 for milk and cookies!
外面有车 大家跟我来 There are buses outside! Everybody follow me!
别急,人人都有份 Don't worry, folks! There's enough milk and cookies for everyone!
我们走 我们走 Let's go, let's go, let's go!
圣诞快乐 Merry Christmas!
现在我们要放上蓝色水晶 And now we'll place the blue crystal.
有很高的振动 Very high vibrations,
对治疗… and it's wonderful, wonderful...
有神奇的疗效 for its healing powers.
好,我们试试两个 Okay. Let's try two of those.
再试一个粉红的 And another pink one.
好的 All right.
哈 Hah!
看起来象我的狗呕吐的东西 Looks like somethin' my dog puked up.
我和美女出去吃顿饭怎么样? How 'bout me and you dolls go out and get some real food?
当然 Sure.
炸薯条和上等腰肉排骨 French fries and a porterhouse steak.
或者我们不吃肉 直接去蒙太奇 Or we could skip the meal and go right to the "montage a trois."
你和另外的女人在一起吗? Have you ever been with another woman?
象厨房的炊事员 Well, like, in the kitchen and stuff, yeah.
来,给你,这有用 Okay, hey, here. This'll help.
Ah!
- 好啊 - 来 ,把这戴在脸上 - Okay. - Here. Put that on your face.
- 好 - 好了 - Yeah. - There you go.
- 嗨 - 现在你们分辨不出来了吧 - Hi. - Now you can't even tell the difference.
我们可以把这所有的加在汤里 Well, we could put all of this together in a soup.
可以假称为上等的腰肉牛排,安迪 Then we could pretend it's a porterhouse steak, Andy.
我不是安迪 I am not Andy.
安迪病了 Andy is sick.
脆弱 Chick, pick, wick, lick!
不强壮 Dick!
反之我是越来越壮了 Whereas I am getting stronger and stronger.
- 嗨,安迪 - 嗨 - Hi, Andy. - Hey.
嗨 Hey.
想摔交吗? You wanna wrestle?
鲍勃和我… Bob and I...
提出了… came up...
一个… with a...
关于电视节目的想法 an idea for a TV show.
把它变成星期天早上的节目… It'll be a Saturday morning kind of thing...
我可以跟小孩在那玩 where I can goof off with the kids.
是的 Yeah.
我们可以出售,安迪 We can sell that, Andy.
医生说… Did your doctor say it's okay...
可以回去工作吗? to go back to work?
没有,但他会的 No, but he will.
Yeah.
因为… 'Cause...
我要去菲律宾 I'm going to the Philippines.
菲律宾? 去菲律宾干什么? The Philippines? What's in the Philippines?
创造奇迹 A miracle.
我们见面后再说… I just want to say, until we meet again...
请记住- please remember...
In this friendly friendly world
With each day so full of joy
Why should any heart
Be lonely
In this friendly friendly world
With each night so full of dreams
Why should any heart
Be afraid
这是个友好的世界 Yep, it's a friendly world.
我们应该象兄弟姐妹 We should all treat each other like brothers and sisters.
那么每个人 握住你旁边人的手… So everybody put your arm around the person sitting next to you...
跟着音乐的节奏摇摆 and sway back and forth in rhythm to the music.
开始,各位 Come on. Everybody.
即使你不喜欢你旁边的人, 也没关系? Even if you don't like the person sitting next to you. Okay?
当我说"好了" 你们跟着说"好了"行吗? When I say "okay," you say "Okay!" Okay?
行 Okay.
- 好了 - 好了 - Okay. - Okay.
好了 Okay.
大家都唱 "世界是个美丽的地方" Everybody sing, "The world is such a wonderful place."
- The world is such a wonderful place
To wander through
跟着节奏 Follow the bouncing ball.
When you've got someone you love
To wander along with you
天空布满了星星 With the sky so full of stars.
With the sky so full of stars
江河唱着歌 And the river so full of song. River so full of song
Every heart should be
So thankful
谢谢这个友好的世界 Thankful for this friendly, friendly world.
Thankful for this friendly, friendly
World
谢谢你们… Thank you...
谢谢这个友好的世界 for this friendly, friendly world.
谢谢你们… Thank you...
再见 and good-bye.
安迪 Andy! Ohh!
安迪 ... Andy!
安迪,安迪 Andy! Andy!
安迪?今晚你们想见安迪吗? Andy? You guys wanna see Andy tonight?
- 有人有手电简和铁铲吗? - Anybody got a flashlight and a couple of shovels?
好,各位,我们来洁理脏东西 Okay, guys, let's do our dirt!
First I was afraid
I was putrefied
Kept thinkin' I could never live
Without you by my side
But then I spent so many nights
A-thinkin' how you did me wrong
- And I grew strong Mid-tempo Disco]
And I learned to get along
And now I'm back
From outer space
I just walked in to find you here
With that sad look upon your face
I should've changed that stupid lock
I should've asked you for the key
If I'd have known for just one second
You'd be back to bother me
Go on now, go Walk out the door
Don't turn around now
You're not welcome anymore
Weren't you the one that tried to hurt me with "good-bye"
Did you think I'd crumble
Did you think I'd lay down and die
Oh, no, not I I will "sur-vivvy"
As long as I know how to love
I know I'll stay "aleeve"
I've got all my life to live I've got all my love to give
I will "sur-veev"
I will "sur- veev"
I
Will
"Sur-veev"
我会活着！我会活着！ 我会活着！ I will survive! I will survive! I will survive!
我会活着 我会活着 I will survive! I will survive!
我会活着！ I will survive!
Mott the Hoople and the game of Life
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Andy Kaufman and the wrestling match
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Monopoly, Twenty-one Checkers and Chess
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Mr. Fred Blassie in a breakfast mess
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Now, Andy, did you hear about this one
Tell me, are you locked in the punch
Hey, Andy are you goofing on Elvis
Hey, baby
Are we losing touch
If you believed
They put a man on the moon
Man on the moon
If you believe
There 's nothing up his sleeve
- Then nothing is cool - Nothing
If you believed
They put a man on the moon
Man on the moon
If you believe
There 's nothing up his sleeve
- Then nothing is cool - Nothing
If you believed
They put a man on the moon
Man on the moon
If you believe
There 's nothing up his sleeve
- Then nothing is cool - Nothing
I watch the stars fall silent
From your eyes
All the sights that I have seen
I can't believe that I believed
I wish that you could see
There's a new planet in the solar system
There is nothing up my sleeve
I'm pushin' an elephant up the stairs
I'm tossin' up punch lines that were never there
Over my shoulder a piano falls
Crashing to the ground
I'm breaking through I'm bending spoons
I'm keepin' flowers in full bloom
I'm looking for answers from the great beyond
I want the hummingbirds
The dancing bears
Sweetest dreams of you
And look into the stars
And look into the moon
I'm pushing an elephant up the stairs
I'm tossing up punch lines that were never there
Over my shoulder a piano falls
Crashing to the ground
I'm breaking through I'm bending spoons
I'm keeping flowers in full bloom
I'm looking for answers from the great beyond
I'm breaking through I'm bending spoons
I'm keeping flowers in full bloom
I'm looking for answers from the great
Answers from the great
Answers
I'm breaking through I'm bending spoons
I'm keeping flowers in full bloom
I'm looking for answers from the great beyond
I'm breaking through I'm bending spoons
I'm keeping flowers in full bloom
I'm looking for answers from the great
Answers from the great
Answers
Well, it 's time
To say
Good-bye
It's been good
Having you
So near
Although I've got to leave
It 's the end
I'll always be stayin'
Right here
So, all my friends good-bye
It's just about that time
Wish that I could do
Just one more song For you
再见,各位,晚安 Good-bye, everybody! Thank you! Good night!
晚安 Good night!
晚安 Okay! Great! Good night!