好吧 回去我打给你 Great. So,um,I'll give you a call.
- 要记得哦\n- 没问题 - I hope you do.\n- All right.
瞧瞧呀 Look at this.
我刚刚拿到那美女号码了 你们看 I just got that girl's\nnumber. Check it out.
叫Holly 干得好 Holly. Nice.
女生名字要是以ly结尾 通常都很浪 Girls whose names end\nin L-Y are always dirty.
比如说Holly Kelly Carly Lily Holly,Kelly,Carly,Lily.
倒也没说错 Oh,yeah,I know it's true.
更别说那些本以为是名字以Y结尾 And don't even get me started on\ngirlshose names should end in Y,
其实是以I结尾的女生 but instead end in I.
搭上她们就像坐过山车那样 Those girls are like roller coasters.
你得排一长条队 可等你上车后 You got to wait in a long\nline,but once you get up there,
你只会感叹想要抓住美好的人生\n希望别掉链子 you just hold on for dear life\nand hope you don't drop your keys.
知道我要怎么做吗? Hey,you know what I'm gonna do?
我现在就打给她 I'm gonna call her right now.
我要跟她讲\n"嘿 还记得我吧? 有一阵子没见了" I'm gonna do that whole,"Hey,remember\nme? It's been so long."
很有趣吧 因为我刚刚才见过她 See,it's funny because I just saw her.
兄弟 不能打给她 Dude,you can't call her.
你得三天后才能打给她 这是规矩 You have to wait three days to\ncall a woman. That's the rule.
Barney 这规矩已经过时了 Barney,that rule is\ncompletely played out.
女生们都知道你在想什么 Girls know exactly what you're doing.
嘿 我来创造个新规矩 Hey,I got a new rule.
虽然有点不着调 我把它叫做\n"喜欢她 就打给她" It's kind of crazy,but I call\nit,You like her,you call her.
不好意思 能再说一次吗? \n我不太懂"钓不到妞"语 I'm sorry. Can you repeat that?\nI don't speak I Never Get Laid.
Barney 三天之约太愚蠢了 Barney,the Three Days Rule is insane.
你说 谁提出来的? I mean,who even came up with that?
耶稣 Jesus.
Barney 别这样 别把耶稣扯进来 Barney,don't do this. Not with Jesus.
我认真的 三天之约确实是耶稣创造的 Seriously. Jesus started the\nwhole wait-three-days thing.
他被钉死第三天才复活的 He waited three days\nto come back to life.
这才完美嘛 It was perfect.
要是他等一天就复活 \n很多人甚至都不知道他的死讯 If he have only waited one day,a lot of\npeople wouldn't have even heard that he died.
不知情的就跟他打招呼 \n"嘿 耶稣 吃了饭没?" They'd be all,"Hey,Jesus,what up?"
耶稣可能就会这么说 \n"吃啥饭呀? 我昨儿个死了" And Jesus would probably\nbe,like,"What up? I died yesterday."
而其他人就说 \n"呃 我看你还挺鲜活的呀 兄弟" And then they'd be all,Uh,you\nlook pretty alive to me,dude.
然后耶稣就得跟他们解释\n他是怎么奇迹般地复活的 And then Jesus would have to explain how\nhe was resurrected and how it was a miracle.
那些家伙就会说"好了 兄弟你就吹吧" And then,the dude would\nbe,like,Uh,okay,whatever you say,bro.
古人说话咋这么做作 Wow,ancient dialogue\nsounds so stilted now.
然而他要星期六复活也不成\n(耶稣星期日复活) And he's not going to\ncome back on a Saturday.
大家都忙着家务事呢 Everybody's busy doing chores.
他们都在家织布 修胡须 复活可不成\n(犹太人星期六不工作) Working the loom,trimming\ntheir beards. No.
他等到最适合的时间... 第三天 He waits the exact right\nnumber of days... Three.
好了 我保证第三天才打电话\n拜托咱们转话题吧 Okay,I promise-- I'll wait three\ndays. Just please stop talking.
还有 那时是星期日 大家都在教堂呢 Plus,it's Sunday,so\neveryone's in church already.
在教堂见到耶稣 说"不 耶稣竟然死了" They're all in\nthere,Oh,no,Jesus is dead.
然后 砰! 他推开后门 穿过走廊 Then,bam! He bursts through\nthe back door,runs up the aisle.
大家都激动死了 Everyone's totally psyched.
还有 你要知道 击掌就是在那时发明的 And,FYI,that's when he\ninvented the high-five.
三天 Ted Three days,Ted.
三天后再打给那女生 \n因为耶稣要我们等三天 We wait three days to call a woman because\nthat's how long Jesus wants us to wait.
我可是说真的 True story.
老爸老妈浪漫史\n第四季 第21集 How I Met Your\nMother Season04 Episode21
好吧 我保证三天后再打给Holly Okay,fine. I promise,I won't\ncall Holly for three days.
可我没说不能发短信 But I never said anything about texting.
我发了一条可爱又迷人的短信 I started things off with\nsomething cute and charming.
"我正想你呢 所以给你发条小短信" "I was thinking about you,so I thought\nI'd send you a little texty text."
在我手指按上"发送"之时 \n我意识到这一点都不可爱 And the moment I hit "Send," I\nrealized it wasn't cute at all.
小短信 texty text\nIt was the lamest thing\nanyone has ever said to anyone.
对别人说这话 真是丢脸死了
而发短信最大的缺点 \n就是一旦你发了出去... And the worst thing about texting\nis that once you send it...
别! 别跑! Oh,no! No!
就覆水难收了 you can never get it back.
然后...你就等着回信 And then... you wait.
23分钟后 ******
就在你决定再也不给别人发短信的同时 And just when you've decided\nnever to text anyone again...
"我也在想着你呢" "I've been thinking about you,too,
"收到短信时我就躺在浴缸 很奇怪吧?" "and how weird is it that you\ntexted me while I was in the bath?"
- 你怎么了?\n- 啥? - What was that?\n- What?
- 你发出了奇怪的声音\n- 是我的手机 我收到短信了 - You made a noise.\n- That was my phone. I got a text.
- 不是说那个 你发出了裸女之声\n- 啥? - Not that. You made your naked lady noise.\n- What?
每次你见到裸女 就会发出这种声音 Whenever you see a naked\nlady,you make the noise.
才不是呢 I don't do that.
真的吗? Really?
不好意思 Lily Oh,God,sorry,Lily.
家里的男人都出去打猎了\n新几内亚Korowai部落的女人 While the men are out hunting,the women\nof New Guinea's indigenous Korowai tribe
就会在河边洗衣服 wash their clothes in the river.
这肯定是胸部 That's totally a boob.
是那个Holly给你发短信吗? Is that Holly who keeps texting you?
你不是保证过要等三天吗? Didn't you promise to wait three days?
不打电话嘛 发短信可不同 To call,yes. Texting\nis totally different.
随你了 只要把裸女之声调到最低就好 Okay,well,just try to keep the\nnaked lady noises to a minimum.
我没有发出裸女之声 I don't make a naked lady noise.
真的? Really?
我和Holly互发短信直到凌晨2点 Holly and I stayed up texting\nuntil 2:00 in the morning.
第二天我们也发了一整天短信 And we spent the whole next\nday texting each other,too.
她真的很棒 She seemed perfect.
Holly刚跟我说她现在穿着什么 Holly just told me what\nshe's wearing right now.
可真辣呀 It is pretty hot.
不管是什么 我向你保证 她没说真话 Yeah,whatever it is,I can\nguarantee you she's not wearing it.
她在说谎 好让你喜欢她 She's lying to you to make you like her.
- 你怎么知道?\n- 拿来 - How do you know that?\n- Here. Come here.
因为史上从来没有女孩会 Because no woman in the\nhistory of the world is ever
"穿着以前的啦啦队制服 \n静静坐着看建筑杂志" "just sitting around reading architecture\nmagazines in my old cheerleader uniform."
好吧 或许看建筑杂志那是假的 Okay,maybe she's lying about\nthe architecture magazines.
噢 不 Oh,no.
- 噢 不 坏菜了\n- 怎么了? - Oh,no. This is bad.\n- What?
她刚刚发了条短信 \n明显收信人就不该是我 She just sent me a text that was\nclearly meant for someone else.
"亲爱的 我去Generro那儿带点外卖 \n很快回来" "Hey,baby,I picked up some take-out\nfrom Generro's. Be home soon."
听起来不太妙 不过往好的方面想 Okay,yes,this sounds bad,but\nlet's think about this,okay?
可能是她兄弟 或者是有个病了的爸爸 It could be for a brother\nor maybe her sick dad.
继续看 Scroll down.
"然后我要你在沙发上干我" "And then I want you\nto do me on the couch."
好吧 不一定是个病老爸 Okay,maybe not a sick dad.
可能是个变态老爸 对吧? Or a very sick dad. Am I right?
对不起 Sorry.
大伙儿 Hey,guys.
这是啥? God. What is this?
Generro's那儿的外卖 给Lily带的 It's just some take-out from Generro's.\nI'm bringing it home for Lily.
奇怪了 Oh,that's weird.
Holly刚给Ted发了条短信 \n要去Generro's那儿带外卖 Holly just texted Ted something\nabout take-out from Generro's.
等等 Wait a second.
- 你们俩混蛋\n- 怎么了? - You sons of bitches.\n- What?
你们就是Holly You're Holly.
这么说给Ted发短信的人不是Holly? So Ted hasn't been texting Holly at all?
他一直在跟你们发短信? He's been texting you two?
我们就知道他忍不了三天 \n所以我偷了他电话 Look,we knew he'd try to call her before\nthe three days,so I swiped his phone,
把那女生的号码换为我的工作手机号码 and I changed her\nnumber to my work cell.
我们只是想抓到他不遵守规矩\n没想到他给她竟然发短信 We were just gonna bust on him for calling\nher too soon,but then he started texting her.
小短信? Texty text?
噢 Ted Oh,Ted.
可怜的Ted呀 \n咱们--咱们得告诉他这是我们 Oh,poor,sweet Ted. We should...\nwe should tell him it's us.
好 又或者... Yeah. Or...
我们装作是Holly 现在躺在浴缸 we pretend we're Holly,and\nwe're in the bath.
这主意更好 Yeah,that's better.
真好玩 Well,that was fun.
我们还是告诉他真相吧 We should tell him that it's us.
应该的 又或者... Yeah,we should. Or...
我们跟他说红色是咱们的最爱\n还有牛仔装扮非常性感 we tell him our favorite color is red,and\nwe think the cowboy look is very sexy.
不错 Yeah,that's better.
穿着呢 没错 真的很性感 I'm wearing them right\nnow,and they do look sexy.
- 他穿上了那双靴子!\n- 他真的穿上了那双靴子! - He put on the boots!\n- He totally put on the boots!
- 帅呀!\n- 对呀 - That was awesome!\n- Yeah.
不过是时候告诉他是谁在玩他了 But it's time to tell him who\nhe really put those boots on for.
没错 又或者... Yeah. Or...
说美女正宽衣解带 we just took off our shirt.
不错 Yeah,that's better.
你说咱们穿着黑色蕾丝胸罩打底好不? You think maybe we're wearing\na black lace bra underneath?
我觉得咱们不应该打底 I don't think we're\nwearing anything underneath.
老天 咱们真辣 God,we're hot.
现在他只穿着那双牛仔靴子了! \n好戏上场了! Now he's only wearing the\ncowboy boots! It is on!
来吧来吧! 好 咱们这么说... It is so on! Okay,okay,tell\nhim that we're...
咱们慢慢地褪下... we're slowing slipping out of our...
咱们在干嘛呢? What are we doing?
我估计咱们要跟Ted电话做爱了 I think that we're about\nto have sex with Ted.
你们就这么一整天地耍他? 太过分了 So,you did this to him\nall day? That's just mean.
不...这样是为了他好 No,no. No,it was... It was\nactually for his own good.
我们在保护他不被自己所伤害 We're protecting him from himself.
他...他真的喜欢这女孩 He... No. He really likes this girl.
从他的眼神能看出来 He had that-that look in his eye.
对 那种"我会进展过快而搞砸"的眼神 Yeah,that crazy "I'm about to move\ntoo fast and screw this up" look.
这跟与你第一次约会的眼神是一样的 It was actually the same look he\nhad on his first date with you.
- 大家都记得最后怎样了吧\n- 没错 - And we all remember how that went.\n- Yeah.
- 我爱上你了\n- 啥? - I think I'm in love with you.\n- What?
嗯 我-我觉得自己是个特别的例子 Yeah,well,I-I think\nI was a special case.
这个Holly可不是Robin Scherbatsky This Holly is no Robin Scherbatsky.
嘿 她头发是怎么回事? Hey,what is the deal with her hair?
最新消息:就跟现在的空调一样偷工减料 I mean,news flash: they make\nconditioners that don't leave a buildup.
我太坏了 I'm so b.
听着 Ted很久没这么喜欢过一个人了 Look,it's been a while since\nTed really liked someone.
他隐忍了很久 我们只是... He's clearly got a lot of\ncrazy stored up. We just...
我们想让他说"我爱你"之前\n起码能了解下这个女孩 we thought we'd get him to say "I love you"\nbefore he even makes contact with this girl.
你跟她继续说 我拿证据出来 And you can tell it's on the way.\nHe's exhibiting all the telltale signs.
第一:他拿结婚开玩笑 Yeah. One: He joked\nabout getting married.
"你喜欢建筑师? 咱们结婚吧" \n"哈哈 LOL."\n(laugh out loud简写 大声地笑) "You like architecture? We\nshould get married." "Ha-ha.LOL."
"开玩笑的啦 问号" "Just kidding. Question mark?"
第二:他太单刀直入了 Two: He made a crazy\nway-too-soon trip suggestion.
"我也喜欢啤酒 咱们一起去德国吧" "I like beer,too. We should\ntotally go to Germany together."
"LOL.JK.LOL." (just kidding简写 开玩笑) "LOL.JK.LOL."
第三:他太快进入私人话题 And three: He got way\ntoo personal way too soon.
"我父母几年前离婚了 "Yeah,my parents got\ndivorced a couple years back.
那时我很难过" "LOL." It was really tough." LOL."
他肯定不知道LOL啥意思吧 And he clearly doesn't\nknow what LOL means.
还有个更严重的问题 Yeah,but here's the real problem.
Ted没我们想象中容易说"我爱你" Ted wasn't saying "I love you"\nas easily as we thought he would.
直到我们遇到...Stan Then we met... Stan.
吵吵啥呀? 伙计 Why are you making so much noise,man?
我们就跟他解释咯 解释完后 \n有趣的事情发生了 So we explained everything to him,and when\nwe were done,something amazing happened.
不如你们跟Ted说 他能想着你们 Why don't you tell Ted that just knowing\nhe's out there,thinking about you,
关心你们 让你们有安全感很开心? caring about you,makes you feel safe?
你们的恐惧 往事统统赶走 So,all your fears,all\nyour yesterdays wash away,
希望就留在他承诺的怀抱中 and only hope remains in\nthe promise of his embrace.
Stan好家伙 他谁呀? Go,Stan. Who is this guy?
他是个夜班的保安 He's a security guard who works nights.
他每天都在Maclaren's吃午饭 And he eats lunch at\nMacLaren's every day.
- 他还没说完\n- 喝了点小酒后 - And he wasn't done.\n- Not by a long shot.
你让我为自己犯下的每个错误\n都心怀感激 You make me thank God for\nevery mistake I ever made
因为它们把我带到你身边 because each one led me down\nthe path that brought me to you.
你真好 兄弟 That's,uh,really nice,man.
管他呢 挺好的 Whatever. It's okay.
"当相遇那一天终于来临 \n我想要你抱着我" "And when finally come\ntogether,"I want you to hold me.
"整晚的抱着我 抚摸着我的秀发" Hold me" "all night. Stroke my hair."
"让我知道自己是个弱女子\n而你是个真男人" "Tell me I'm a woman\nand show me you're a man.
"矢志不渝" Until there there was only now."
"你和我...尽在此刻" You and I... and now."
我愿意! Yes!
你想让我把这些话发给Ted 我明白了 You want me to text\nthat to Ted. I know that.
"我不需要你今晚做出决定 "I do not ask "of the\nnight explanations.
我愿意等 而这感觉拥抱着我" I wait for it,and it envelops me,"
"而我也被你被面包和阳光以及阴影围绕" "and so you and bread\nand light and shadow are."
这是诗人Pablo Neruda写的 That's Pablo Neruda.
我不知道干嘛会提到面包 I don't know,um,what\nbread was doing in there,
但这些话真的打动我的这里和这里 but that touched me here and here.
好吧 如果Ted不愿说这番话 \n我替他会说的 Well,if Ted won't say it,I will.
我爱你 I love you.
很好 That's cool.
还是没回复 啊? Still nothing,huh?
可能他并不爱我们吧 Maybe he's not in love with us.
他怎能不爱我们?\n我们就是他苦苦寻找的一切 How can he not be in love with us?\nWe're everything he's looking for.
我真搞不懂男人 I don't get men.
我要回去工作了 Got to head to work.
你还会...还会回来吗? Will you be... Will you be back?
当风吹起 命运召唤我之时\n我会回来的 I'll be back when the wind and\nfates and chance bring me back.
可能是明天吧 Which will be tomorrow.
明天奶酪牛排搞特价 It's cheese steak day.
听着你们很迷这个大汉啊 It sounds like you\nwere all over this guy.
希望他的女朋友不会吃醋 Hope his girlfriend didn't get jealous.
他有提到女朋友或者... Did he mention a girlfriend or...
一切进展顺利直到Marshall\n把给Lily的短信误发给了Ted 全毁了 It was all going great until Marshall sent Ted\na text meant for Lily and ruined everything.
没关系 知道吧 一切都结束了 Well,it doesn't matter.\nOkay? It's over now.
我要走了 但是你们得这么做: I got to get going,but\nhere's what's going to happen:
你们赶紧打电话给他 \n坦白你们的恶作剧 向他道歉 You're going to call him right\nnow,tell him what you did,and apologize.
- 你们听清楚了吗?\n- 明白了 - You got it?\n- Yes.
或者... Or...
Holly解释说那完全是个误会 Holly explained everything. It\nwas all just a misunderstanding.
- 现在没事了 \n- 真的? - Everything's great now.\n- Really?
那么Holly是怎么解释那件事的? Uh,how did,uh,Holly explain\nher way out of that one?
事实上是她的蠢朋友Marsha\n不小心用了她的手机给老公Billy发短信 Well,apparently,her dumb friend Marsha accidentally\nused her phone to text her husband Billy.
Marsha和Billy Marsha and Billy.
可真是天衣无缝啊 No one sprained any muscles there.
我们俩感情反而更好了 And now we are better than ever.
看 虽然听起来很不可思议\n但我觉得自己是爱上这个女孩了 Look,I know this sounds crazy,but I think\nI might actually be falling for this girl.
- 你是爱上了Barney和Marshall\n- 什么? - You're falling for Barney and Marshall.\n- What?
他们不相信你会等上3天 They didn't believe that you\ncould wait the three days,
所以Barney把你手机里她的号码\n换成了自己的商务号码 so Barney changed her number\nin your phone to his work cell.
Holly就是Barney和Marshall Holly is Barney and Marshall.
慢着 这全是他们搞的? Wait. That whole time it was them?
那么Holly没有躺在浴缸里? So Holly wasn't in the bath?
没有坐在窗户边上 \n看着满天繁星 在想我? Or sitting by her window,looking\nup at the stars,thinking about me?
也没有套上旧拉拉队服在读建筑杂志? Or lounging in her old cheerleader\nuniform reading architecture magazines?
对 我想他们都没做这些事 Yeah. I don't think they\nactually did those things.
他们只是待在酒吧里 They were just at the bar.
没错 Right.
没错 但就是他们搞的鬼 But,yeah,it was them.
- 真不敢相信 \n- 我明白 - Unbelievab.\n- I know.
你也可以跟他们说\n你识破了他们的恶作剧 So you might as well tell\nthem you're on to them.
对 或者... Yeah. Or...
我给他们发一些让他们摸不着头脑的东西 I text them something that will\nreally mess with their heads.
哦 我明白了 比如说... Oh,I gotcha. Okay. How about...
"我没跟自己的朋友提起过\n其实我只剩3个月的命了?" "I haven't told any of my friends\nyet,but I only have three months to live?"
- 不错\n- 对 - Not bad.\n- Yeah.
比如说 "我曾经拿铁铲杀了一个人\n那种感觉似乎又回来了"? How about "I once killed a man with a\nshovel,and those feelings are creeping up again"?
我喜欢刚才有人提到的\n只剩3月寿命的建议 I-I liked that thing someone said\nbefore about having three months to live.
比如说"我从未跟别人说过 \n但我和好友的妈妈上过床"? How about "I never told anyone this,but\nI slept with my best friend's mom"?
不错 \n但我更想接着回到只剩3个月可活的话题 Oh,that is good,but I feel like we keep\ncoming back to that three months to live thing.
- 等等 我知道了 \n- 哦 真的? - Wait. I think I got it.\n- Oh,yeah?
他回短信了! He texted back!
"我本不该跟你说的" "I probably shouldn't tell you this.
"我是说我们根本不了解彼此" I mean we barely know each other."
"但是管他呢 我还是想说" But what the hell,I'll just say it.
来了来了 伙计\n要说"我爱你"了 This is it,dude. Here\ncomes the "I love you."
- 真希望Stan也在这儿 - Stan\n- I sh Stan were here.\n- Stan.
什么? What?
我有时会做跟自己的好友玩同志的梦 I sometimes have gay\ndreams about my best friend.
Ted到底为何会对一个陌生的女孩说\n他有时会对我存有同性恋幻想? Why in the world would Ted text a girl he barely\nknows that he sometimes has gay dreams about me?
慢着下结论 他指的是你? Slow your roll. You?
很明显他是在说我 He's clearly talking about me.
伙计 是我 我是他最好的哥们 Dude,it's me. I'm his best friend.
好吧 第一:这从未得到证实 Okay,one: that has never been proven.
第二:如果有人会对我们其中一个\n产生同性恋幻想 那也必然是对我 Two: If anyone were to have gay\ndreams about one of us,it would be me.
看看我 再看看你自己 I mean,look at me. Now look at you.
即使是80岁的老古董也不会是\n你这副德行 A still-in-the-closet 80-year-old\nwouldn't be into that mess.
关键在于 Barney 我让人感觉温暖\n而你不是 Here's the thing,Barney.\nI'm snuggly. You're not.
谁周日早上不想偎依在这结实的怀抱里? Who wouldn't want to snuggle up next\nto this business on a Sunday morning?
缠绕在胸膛里 就算窗外下着雨\n烤炉里正热着松饼 Wrapped in a comforter,and it's raining\noutside,and there's muffins warming in the oven.
我就是如此居家 贱人 \n就是这样 I'm cuddly,bitch. Deal with it.
我每天都健身 I work out every day.
我们最了解Ted的莫过于他喜欢好身材 If there is one thing we know about\nTed,it's that he likes a nice body.
这副身材会让他疯狂 This body would rock his world.
我和Ted结交多年\n我知道他的喜好 Ted and I have a history.\nI know what he likes.
我能为他做的那些事 会让他失去理智... There are things I could do to\nhim that would blow his mind...
为啥我们要抢着去和Ted嘿咻? Why do we keep trying\nto have sex with Ted?
我也不知道 太奇怪了 I don't know. It's weird.
简直疯了 对吧? Crazy,right?
Ted对我有同性恋幻想 Ted's having gay dreams about me.
他所说的"我" \n指的是M-E Marshall Eriksen And by me,he means\nM-E,Marshall Eriksen,
Ted同性恋春梦里的情人 star of Ted's gay dreams.
管他呢 \n就是说Ted同性恋春梦梦到你们其中一个 Who cares? So Ted has gay\ndreams about one of you guys.
而不是你们发现他只剩3个月的寿命 It's not like you found out\nhe has three months to live.
这真是 太震惊了 对吧? That's like,oh,shocking,right?
嘿 瞧瞧这小子 Hey,look at this guy.
今天还好吧? 12年的好朋友 How's it going,uh,best\nfriend of 12 years?
感觉很奇怪 \n但是我昨晚做了个疯狂的梦 Well,it's kind of weird,but,uh,I\nhad this crazy dream the other night.
真令人尴尬 It's a little embarrassing.
你可以告诉我们 Ted\n这里很安全 You can tell us,Ted.\nThis is a safe space.
你的感觉是很正常的 伙计 ah,your feelings are\nperfectly natural,buddy.
好吧 事情是这样的 那么我当时在... Okay. Here's what happened. So I'm at...
于是我浪费了这俩混蛋半小时的时间 And then I proceeded to waste a\nhalf hour of those bastards' lives,
告诉他们我的梦 telling them about this dream I had
梦里我跟最喜欢的5位建筑师一起吃饭 where I ate dinner with my top five\nfavorite architects throughout history.
最后吃完饭 Frank Gehry把账单推给I.M.Pei And then,at the end of the meal,Frank\nGehry slides the check over to I.M.Pei,
他说 伙计 今晚你就是"付账先生"了\n(与其名字谐音) and he says,Buddy,tonight,your\nname is I.M.Paying.
Buckminster Fuller差点喷饭了 Buckminster Fuller\nalmost did a spit take.
然后我就醒了 And then I woke up.
那么 就这样? So,that-that's it?
没做别的梦? No other dreams?
- 迷乱或者色情的梦呢?\n- 没有 - Nothing confusing or erotic?\n- Nope.
好吧 这么说吧 Okay,how about this?
Ted 你知道未来的某天 \n机器会统治人类? Ted,you know how at some point in the\nfuture,machines will rise up against us?
- 当然 \n- 好吧 那么机器-- - Sure. -\nOkay.So,the machines--
它们摧毁了全人类 they've killed everybody,
只剩下你和我 还有Barney and all that's left\nis you,me,and Barney.
你会选哪一个 就像是... Which one of us would you,like...
一起生活? get with?
呣... And,um...
我为啥要跟你们其中一个生活? why do I have to get with one of you?
那些机器强迫你 The machines are forcing you.
它们想要围观一下\n它们就这个风格 They want to watch. That's\njust how they get down.
哦 那真是... 真是...真是个难题 Oh,that's a... that's\na... That's a tough one.
我想如果非得选的话... I guess it would have to be...
选Holly Holly.
Robin告诉我短信是你们发的 Robin told me what you guys did.
这就是为何我编造了同性恋春梦的事 That's why I made up\nthe gay dreams thing.
伙计们 这就是Holly Uh,guys,this is Holly.
我没有按照你们说的\n等上宝贵的三天再联系她 And I didn't wait your\nprecious three days to call her.
我知道她工作的地方\n便直接去找她 I knew where she worked,so\nI tracked her down.
让我来问问你\n我给你打电话早了吗? Um,let me ask you. Did\nI call you too soon?
我喜欢他立马给我电话 I loved that he called me right away.
我觉得很浪漫 I found it very romantic.
顺便一提 \n我不会坐在公寓里读建筑杂志 And by the way,I don't sit around my\napartment reading architecture magazines
还穿着我的旧拉拉队服 in my old cheerleader uniform.
我都是裸着的 I do that completely naked.
那么 我和Holly要出去吃晚餐了 So,uh,Holly and I are\ngoing out to dinner.
- 我在门口等你 \n- 好的 - I'll meet you out front.\n- Okay.
抱歉伙计 我们只是想要帮你 I'm sorr bud. We-We were\njust trying to help you.
而且 这很有趣 And,also,it was really fun.
我不需要你们的帮助 好吧?\n我自己能搞掂 I don't need your help,okay?\nI can take care of myself.
没错 也许... And,yeah,maybe...
也许有些女孩子\n不喜欢我立刻给她们打电话 maybe there are some girls who wouldn't\nlike it that I called them right away
或者太早说爱她 但是知道吗? or said things too soon,but guess what?
她们不是适合我的女孩 Those aren't the right girls for me.
也许适合我的女孩会喜欢我做的事 Maybe the right girl is the one\nwho loves that I do those thin
因为这才是我 \n我不会因为愚蠢的3日原则而改变自己 because that's just who I am,and I'm not going\nto change because of some stupid Three Days Rule.
哦 还有Holly的名字其实是以"I"结尾的 Oh,and,um,Holly spells\nher name with an "I."
我证明了3日法则是错误的 \n并和一个美女去吃晚餐 So I had proven that the Three Days Rule was\nwrong,and I was out to dinner with a pretty girl.
直到今日 \n我都没有跟人提过那晚发生了什么 And until right now,I've never told anyone\nthe truth about what happened on that date.
太有趣了! 我也喜欢印度音乐 That's so funny! I love indie music,too.
咱俩真该结婚 We should get married.
开玩笑的 或者我确实这么想的? Just kidding. Or am I?
还是开玩笑 Just kidding again.
没错 我们真该一起去巴西! That's it. We're totally\ngoing to Brazil together!
今早我去见了医生 他说我都康复了\n我可以走了 And I went to my doctor this morning,and he\nsaid it is all cleared up,so I'm good to go.
我想我爱上你了 Ted I think I'm in love with you,Ted.
最后 我不需要等上3天 \n需要等的人是Holly In the end,I didn't need to wait\nthree days,but Holly really,really did.
正如许多的规矩一样 \n有时我们需要遵守 有时未必 Like a lot of rules,there are times\nto follow them and times to not.
但我要告诉你们 But I will tell you this.
当我拿到你们老妈的号码\n我立马打给了她 When I got your mother's\nnumber,I called her right away.
- Stan! - 嘿 伙计们 - Stan!\n- Hey,fellas.
- Stan 你不用上班?\n- 今晚休息 - Stan,aren't you working?\n- Took the night off.
- 太棒了! 咱们可以出去啦!\n- 没错 - That's great! We can all hang out!\n- Yeah.
不行 我有约了 Uh,I can't. Got a date.
- 可以走了吗 宝贝?\n- 走吧 - You ready,baby?\n- Yup.
搞什么... What the...
等等 你们俩不能留下来 \n跟我们一起约会吗? Wait,wait. Couldn't you guys just\nstay here and do your date with us?
没错 这会很有趣的! \n看 我都在笑了! Yeah,it'll be fun! Look,I'm laughing!
这儿很有趣! 你喜欢魔术吗? It's fun here! You like magic?
伙计们 我们该说再见了 Fellas,it-it's time\nwe said good-bye.
我们曾在一起度过一个愉快的下午\n这是我不会忘记的趣事 I mean,we shared a very special afternoon\ntogether,and that's something I will always cherish.
我不会忘了你们的 I'll never forget you guys.
- 你知道他们的名字吗?\n- 不知道 那高个是Ted吗? - Do you even know their mes?\n- No idea. Is the tall one Ted?
不 那是Marshall\n他跟Lily结婚了 No. That's Marshall.\nHe's married to Lily.
- 好吧 你喜欢吃鸡翅吗?\n- 喜欢 - Okay. You like chicken wings?\n- Oh,yeah.