你们不会相信\n昨晚在镭射游戏场发生了什么 You will not believe what\nhappened at laser tag last night.
人们给吓坏了 因为一个穿着\n西装的男人让他们的孩子不得安生? People freaked out because a creepy man\nin a suit wouldn't leave their kids alone?
不是啦 不过 这么说也行 No. Well,yeah,pretty much.
来啊! 想来是吧? Come on! You want it?
我的肩膀啊! My shoulder!
来啊 Come on.
Stinson 马上滚到我办公室来! Stinson,my office! Now!
靠 Crap.
不遵守游戏规则 3次撞到他人\n这次你又这样! Disorderly game play, three\ncounts of shoving, and now this!
Stinson 你是个祸害! Stinson,you're a liability!
我知道我没按你"可贵"的规则玩 McCracken\n但是 去你的 我成绩很好啊! I know I don't play by your precious\nrules,McCracken, but,damn it,I get results!
你是个出色的镭射射击手 Look,you're a good laser tag player.
也许是我见过最优秀的 Maybe the best I've ever seen.
但总有天 你会弄到别人受伤 But one of these days,\nyou're gonna get someone hurt.
也许你会伤到自己的 Maybe even yourself.
你不知道外面的世界是怎么样 You just forgot what\nit's like out there.
你的胖屁股宅在这里太久了 You've had your fat ass stuck\nbehind that desk for too long.
够了! 你被开除会籍了 Stinson! That's it! You're out of here,Stinson!
交枪交证件出来! Hand in your gun and your ID badge!
我巴不得呢 With pleasure.
求你别这么做 这游戏是我的一切 Please don't do this.\nThis game is all I got.
我快攒够票 兑换那个遥控直升飞机了 And I've almost got enough tickets\nfor the remote control helicopter.
求你了 Please.
原谅你我自己都过意不去 I can't believe I'm doing this.
但是我还是给你最后一次机会 But I'm gonna give you one last shot.
不过你听着 要是你再犯规 But so help me, if you so much\nas step one toe out of line,
你就只能在你妈妈的地下室玩打鸭子\n玩的晕头转向了\n(任天堂出品的红白机游戏 也使用枪玩) you're gonna be playing Duck Hunt in your mama's\nbasement so fast it's gonna make your head spin.
现在给我滚出去! Now,get out of here!
不会让你后悔的 You won't regret this.
30秒后 ******
够了 Stinson 你终生不得进入! That's it,Stinson.\nYou're banned for life!
不... No...
老爸老妈的浪漫史\n第四季19集 How I Met Your\nMother Season04 Episode19
真不敢相信你被禁止进入镭射射击场\n那你打算怎么办? I can't believe you got kicked out\nof laser tag. What are you gonna do?
我打算怎么办? 我打算怎么办? What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?
我来告诉你我和Ted打算怎么办 I'll tell you what\nTed and I are gonna do.
过会儿我们就闯进去用厕纸\n封了那里 We're gonna break in after\nhours and TP the place.
Barney 我们年轻不再了\n无法再用厕纸封满一个地方了 Barney,we are too old to\ncover a place in toilet paper
就因为他不让你玩镭射射击游戏 just because they won't\nlet you play laser tag.
而且 我们年纪大了 也玩不动了 And for that matter,\ntoo old for laser tag.
Ted 镭射射击没年龄限制 Ted,laser tag knows no age restrictions.
就像在美国中西部跳脱衣舞那样 Kind of like stripping in the Midwest.
是啊 随便了 Yeah,whatever.
我要把镭射射击也加入Murtaugh列表中 I'm adding laser tag\nto the Murtaugh List.
- 天呐 别加进去\n- 耶 - Oh,jeez,not the Murtaugh List.\n- Yeah.
什么是Murtaugh列表? What's the Murtaugh List?
Murtaugh列表最早出现在我30岁那时 The Murtaugh List is something that came\ninto being around the time I turned 30.
源于你Marshall叔叔的漏斗喝酒游戏 It all started with your\nUncle Marshall's beer bong.
2 1 喝! two,one,chug!
在我们20多岁时每次聚会都有那游戏 When we were in our early 20s, every time\nwe had a party, that beer bong came out.
即便我们30岁了亦是如此 And around the time we\nturned 30,same thing.
当然 在我们20多的时候 \n第二天我们会这样 Of course,in our early 20s,\nthe next day would go like this.
但到了30多的时候 \n第二天就变成这样了 But by the time we were 30,\nthe next day would go like this.
然后有一天 在我经历人生最痛苦的宿醉后 Then one day,in the throes of\nthe worst hangover of my life,
我发现全世界只有一个人能和我联系起来: I realized there was only one person\nin the world that I could relate to:
Danny Glover在80年代的黑色电影杰作\n致命武器中扮演的Roger Murtaugh警官 Detective Roger Murtaugh, played by Danny Glover\nin the '80s noir masterpiece Lethal Weapon,
他有句经常被引用的举世经典: known for his oft-quoted catchphrase:
- 我岁数大了受不了这些...\n- 折腾 - I'm too old for this...\n- Stuff.
他说"我岁数大了受不了这些折腾" He said,"I'm too old for this stuff."
虽然不想承认 但当你年纪大了\n有些事你的确做不了了 It's sad to admit, but as you get older,\nthere's just certain things you can't do anymore.
这就是我做那列表的原因\n所以我现在就不会再想 That's why I have this list, so I\nnever make the mistake of thinking
我还能通宵达旦的玩 that I can still pull an all-nighter.
我老了干不来了 I'm too old for that stuff.
或者是我能很快吃完一整个披萨 Or eat an entire pizza in one sitting.
我老了干不来了 I'm too old for that stuff.
或者不用梯子就往你墙上贴海报 Or hang posters on your\nwall without frames.
Riggs Riggs!\nRiggs. Riggs!
我老了干不来了 I'm too old for that stuff.
顺便问下 致命武器怎么个好看法? By the way,how good isLethal Weapon?
我不知道 有点名过其实了 Oh,I don't know. It's\nkind of a rip-off.
老家伙和年轻叛逆的警察搭档 Old guy paired up with\na young,renegade cop.
是不是听起来很熟悉呢? Sound familiar?
Mackleroy和LeFleur Mackleroy and LeFleur.
别告诉我你们\n从来没看过Mackleroy和LeFleur Don't tell me you guys have\nnever seen Mackleroy and LeFleur.
那是加拿大史上最叫座的动作电影 It's the greatest Canadian\naction movie of all time.
Mackleroy是个年轻叛逆的骑警\n但他的马被邪恶的美国人杀了 Mackleroy is a young, renegade Mountie whose\nhorse was just killed by evil Americans,
而他的搭档LeFleur是个年纪大\n爱抱怨的非裔加拿大人 while LeFleur,his grouchy,\nold,African-Canadian partner,
则刚刚在阿尔伯达省北部\n买了间有暖气的钓鱼小屋... just bought a cozy ice fishing\nshack in northern Alberta...
好了 我该走了 All right,I got to go.
拜拜 宝贝 练习愉快哦 Bye,baby. Have fun at practice.
练习? 他又要去玩一人乐队啦? \n那很傻哦 Practice? Is he doing that one-man band\nthing again? 'Cause that was a bummer.
其实Marshall刚刚成为了Lily\n幼儿园的篮球队教练 Actually, Marshall had just taken over as\ncoach for Lily's kindergarten basketball team.
他以为那会很有趣 \n但Lily的目标更远大 学会当父亲 He thought it'd be fun, but Lily saw\nit as something more-- dad practice.
天呐! 橙子切片 真贴心啊 Oh,my gosh! Orange\nslices. That is so sweet.
- 是啊\n- 你来这干嘛? - Yeah.\n- What are you doing here?
我受不了了 \n我想看看Marshmall教练是怎么训练的 89 \nI couldn't resist. I wanted to\nsee Coach Marshmallow do his thing.
好吧 Okay.
孩子们 想不想早点结束\n享受一下美味的橙子切片呢? Hey,kids, who wants to knock off early\nand have some of these here orange slices?
想嘞? 但你们不行! Yeah? Well,you can't!
因为橙子是给胜利者吃的\n而你们这帮小白痴一个球也投不进去! Because oranges are for winners, and you little\nturds haven't even made a single shot yet!
你们是在丢自己的脸 \n也丢了Aldrin小姐的脸 You're embarrassing yourselves,\nyou're embarrassing Ms.Aldrin,
最要命的是你们也让我丢脸! and worst of all,\nyou're embarrassing me!
就这样! 底线折返跑 现在开始! That's it! Suicides! Baseline! Now!
跑 Run.
Ted 这没有一件是因为你年纪大干不来的 Ted,there is not a single thing\non here that you are too old to do.
相反 如果你把列表上的都做了\n那才叫一个完美的愉快周末呢 In fact,if you did everything on the Murtaugh\nList, I'd call that a pretty fun weekend.
Barney 你不再是18岁啦 Barney,you are not 18 anymore.
如果这列表上的事你都做了\n那你就一命呜呼了 If you did everything on\nthat list,you would die.
- 这不是挑战\n- 接受挑战 - That wasn't a challenge.\n- Challenge accepted.
在接下来的一天里\n我就把列表上所列的一件件做给你看 In the next 24 hours, I'm going to\ndo every single thing on this list.
我完成了 你就和我去把那\n镭射射击场用厕纸封了 And after I do,you will TP\nthe laser tag place with me.
如果你做不到呢? And if you can't do it?
我就听你谈三个小时的建筑 I will spend three hours listening\nto you talk about architecture.
成交 You have got yourself a deal.
Robin 你来见证一下? Robin,will you do the honors?
- 君子一言!\n- 驷马难追! - A gentleman's agreement!\n- Huzzah!
好啊 大块头 走着瞧 All right,chumps, let's do this.
Barney 帅Stinson! Barney Stinson!
你真的和他打赌? \n你很清楚他是什么样的人 You really want to make this\nbet with him? You know how he is.
Robin 列表上棘手的事多了去了 Robin,there is some pretty\ntough stuff on that list.
你真的信Barney会去穿耳洞吗? I mean,do you really think\nBarney's gonna get his ear pierced?
"穿耳洞"了 搞定 "Get ear pierced." Check.
好 我这就去妈妈家洗衣服 All right,I'm off to go\ndo laundry at Mom's house.
你们不介意我今晚睡你们家的蒲团上吧? Hey,you guys mind if I\ncrash on your futon tonight?
我们家没有蒲团 We don't have a futon.
放在那吧 伙计 Put it over there,boys.
干嘛啊? What's going on?
Murtaugh列表上写的 It's on the Murtaugh List.
"不住酒店而在你朋友家的草席上过夜" "Crash on a friend's futon\ninstead of getting a hotel room."
我太老了干不来了 Ooh,I am too old for that stuff.
伙计 你耳朵怎么啦? Dude,what's going on with your ear?
看起来像11月3号的南瓜一样\n(万圣节后的南瓜开始烂了) Looks like the inside of a\njack-o'- lantern on November 3rd.
什么 这个啊? 有点感染而已 What,this? Ah,just a little infecsh.
像我这么年轻的人有什么不能摆平的 Nothing a young guy\nlike me can't shake off.
也算完成列表上的 "不看医生" Plus,"Put off going to\nthe doctor," on the list.
等等 Oh,hold on.
我是Bar... Go for Bar...
继续跑! Keep running!
告诉你些有趣的\n我本来是来教他们的 You know what's funny, is I was\nsupposed to come here to teach them--
别停下来! Do not stop running!
但我也从他们身上获益良多 This whole time,they've been\nthe ones who are teaching me.
那不是跑步! 那是爬! That's not running! That's falling!
第二天 Barney在客厅的蒲团上醒来 The next morning, Barney woke up\non the futon in our living room.
搞定 Check.
"和陌生人喝酒" 搞定 "Drinking shots with strangers." Check.
你还好吧 Barney? 你好像弄伤背了 You okay,Barney? It looks\nlike you hurt your back.
才没有 扮下驼背而已 Oh,no. Just rocking a party hunch.
我喜欢这样 离我的酒近点 I like it. Closer to my booze.
为年轻而干杯 To youth.
给我根吸管好吗? Can I get a straw?
我不得不赞扬下Barney那颗\n想永葆青春的心 I must say,there's something admirable about\nthe way Barney wants to stay young at heart.
谁想变老呢? I mean,who wants to get old?
这个人 This guy.
Robin 人的一生就像一餐饭\n而老年就相当于饭后甜点 Robin,life is a meal and\nold age is the dessert.
我花了不少时间担心未来 I spend so much of my time\nworrying about the future.
我的工作会如何? 会和谁结婚? You know, where's my career\ngoing? Who am I gonna marry?
但如果你老了 你就不用担心了\n因为人生已成定局 But when you're old, you don't worry,\n'cause that stuff's already happened.
再说了 穿上舒服的鞋 坐轮椅上\n别人推你上下楼 多完美的事啊 Plus,you get to wear comfy shoes and a chair\ntakes you up and down the stairs; it's perfect.
那不是完美 是可悲啊 That's not perfect. That's pathetic.
你不能只看结果 You can't just jump to the end.
过程才最重要 The journey is the best part.
Robin 我曾经也是那么想的 Oh,Robin.I used to feel that way,too,
你年纪再大点就会明白了 but you'll understand when\nyou're a little bit older.
Marshall 你今天能别教训那帮孩子吗 Marshall, can you try not\nto pick on the kids today.
我没有教训那帮孩子 Lily I'm not picking on the kids,Lily.
我是指责这常败将军般的氛围 I'm picking on the culture\nof losing around here.
我 我得排好队形 那样明天才能赢球 I\n- I got to get them in shape if they're gonna win that game tomorrow.
赢球? 我们不记分的呀 Win? We don't keep score.
- 什么?\n- 我们不记分 - What?\n- We don't keep score.
你不记... You don't keep s...
那不记分的比赛有什么意义? 你怎么... What's the point of playing if you\ndon't keep score? How do you know...
Lily 我来之前这球队是怎么样的? Lily,what were you doing with\nthis team before I got here?
我来训练他们 I was coaching them.
就是这样 小天使们 That's it,my little angels.
你们就是发光发亮的小精灵 You're all luminous\nwonderful beings of light.
比分是多少? What's the score?
平分啊 娱乐对娱乐! It's all tied up at fun to fun!
因为比赛的真正意义在于 享受比赛 Because that's the point\nof playing-- to have fun.
不是 比赛的意义就是要赢得奖杯 No. The point of playing\nis to win thetrophy.
不知道谁赢 谁会得到奖杯呢? And if you don't know who's\nwinning,who gets the trophy?
所有人啊 Everyone.
参与者就有奖杯 人人有份 It's a participation\ntrophy; everyone gets one.
怎么感觉你好像在说中文呢 It's like you're speaking\nChinese to me right now.
- 我们是Barney\n- 和Robin - Hi,this is Barney.\n- And Robin.
现在我们无法接电话 因为... We can't answer the\nphone right now because...
他在看体育节目 而我... He's watching sports and I'm...
可能出去逛街了 Probably out shopping.
有事留言 我们会... Leave a message and we'll\ncall you back just as soon...
- 回...\n- 你... - As...\n- We...
- 电话!\n- 电话! - Can!\n- Can!
"在电话答录机上\n录下讨厌的双人留言" 完成 "Leave an annoying two-person message\non your answering machine." Check.
可能会搞砸我几次约会 但没关系 Probably gonna cost me\nsome dates but it's okay.
Barney 你耳朵都发臭了 Barney,your ear's starting to smell.
不会 它没事 Nah,it's good.
我不想把它退回 \n但是你保证这火鸡肉是全瘦的 I hate to send it back, but you did\ndescribe the turkey as extremely lean,
你自己看看吧 and,well,you tell me.
- 好吧 我们也有张列表给你\n- 啥? - All right. That's it. We have our own list.\n- What?
上面列着年轻人不做的事 This is a list of things\nyou're too young to do.
把上面每件事轮着做一遍\n然后告诉我你还想当老人 Go out and do each one of these things and\nthen tell me you still want to be an old man.
去掉"结肠镜检查"还有"和老妇女嘿咻"\n余下的都小菜一碟 Remove "colonoscopy" and "Have sex with\nan old lady," and this is a cakewalk.
那来重新打个赌吧 New stakes,then.
要是我先完成列表上的事项 If I can finish your list\nbefore you finish mine,
你就得和我去镭射战场捣乱\n厕纸也由你买 you have to come with me to TP laser\ntag and you have to buy the toilet paper.
而且是无法降解那种 And none of that biodegradable crap.
我要它永远地高高飘扬 I want it up there forever.
好吧 但要是我拔得头筹 Fine, but if I finish your list first,
你陪我聊6个小时的美国20世纪初建筑业 it's a six hour survey of early\n20th century American architecture
而且你再也不能干Murtaugh表上的任何一个事项 and you can never do anything\non the Murtaugh List ever again.
这也是为你着想 It's for your own good.
先生 我们成交 You,sir, have got yourself a deal.
- 君子一言!\n- 驷马难追! - A gentleman's agreement!\n- Huzzah!
Marshall 他们才上幼儿园\n你不能这么教篮球 Marshall,they're in kindergarten.\nThis isn't how you teach basketball.
当然能 我就是这么学的 Sure it is. It's the way I learned.
开什么玩笑? Are you kidding me?
哪个神经病这么教你? What kind of sociopath\ntaught you this way?
拜托 老爸 我吃不消了 Come on,Dad. I'm tired.
胜者才有权睡觉 Sleep is for winners.
要是你投进一球 就能去睡觉 You can go to bed when\nyou score a basket.
我尽力了 I'm trying.
那就奖励你2分 Oh,let's give you two points for trying.
可惜是负2分 你吃了个大盖帽 But negative two points\nfor having a great big head.
我爸对我毫不留情 我也绝不服软 My father gave me no quarter\nand I asked for no quarter.
我得吼吼他们 I totally got to call that guy.
别停下! Keep stretching!
"戴上老花镜" 搞定 "Put on reading glasses." Check.
"对邻居家孩子大吼两声" "Yell at neighborhood kids."
求之不得 My pleasure.
你咋回事? What the hell happened to you?
我只是完成了"弄伤了膝盖 疼得要死"的小意外 Oh,I just had a very minor "blew out my\nknee and it hurts like hell" incident.
你咋弄伤的啊? How did you blow out your knee?
我们"帮六层楼无电梯公寓的居民搬家\n换得匹萨和啤酒" We,uh,"Helped someone move out of a sixth\nfloor walk-up in exchange for pizza and beer."
或者说 我们帮人抢劫无电梯公寓" Or we,uh,helped someone\nrob a sixth floor walk-up.
他们火烧火燎地把照片都落下了 They were in a big hurry and\nleft all the pictures behind.
不管咋样 这也算 Whatevs,it counts.
现在 我要去"把头发染个搞怪的颜色" Now,I am off to "Dye\nmy hair a funny color,"
然后我们去"放纵狂欢" and then we are going\nto, "Go to a rave."
4点! 晚餐时间到 Ooh,4:00! Supper time.
好吧 你爸爸对你真严厉 Okay. So,your dad was tough on you.
确实很讨厌 但你没必要像他一样强硬 That stinks, but you\ndon't have to be like him.
你该从中吸取教训 You can learn from his mistakes.
教训? Lily 记分板\n他成功了 好吧? Mistakes? Lily,scoreboard.\nThe guy nailed it,okay?
他教会我如何成为赢家 He taught me how to be a winner.
我就是这么教这些孩子的 That's what I'm teaching these kids.
还有 我以后也会这么教自己的孩子 And,for that matter, that's what\nI'm gonna teach our kids someday.
好吧 够了 Okay,that's it.
我们不能这样教育我们的小孩! This is not how we're\ngonna raise our kids!
你也不能这么训练篮球队! And this is not how you're\ngonna coach this team!
在明天比赛上 你要表现得像\n装满棉花糖和礼物的泰迪熊 At tomorrow's game, if you are anything less than\na teddy bear stuffed with cotton candy and rainbows,
否则我会用沉默和你抗争到底! I will silent treatment\nyour ass into the ground!
你会明白我发现你的网页搜索记录的那次\n只是小菜一碟!\n(这次才是真格的) You'll think the time I found your Internet\nsearch history was a freakin' picnic!
听明白没有? Are we clear?
Lily 语言有很多不同表... Lily,there are many different philo...
- 听明白没有?\n- 是 夫人 - Are we clear?\n- Yes,ma'am.
讽刺的是...Lily 别! You know, what's ironic\nis that now... Lily,no!
打电话给Ted 我要回家 Just call Ted. I want to go home.
好的 我这就打 但现在是早上4点半 All right. I'm calling him.\nBut it's 4:30 in the morning.
他不可能醒着的 He's not going to be awake.
4点起床...搞定 Up at 4:00... Check.
- 电话他接了吗?\n- 我还没拨呢 - Is he answering?\n- I haven't dialed yet.
拜托快点 Robin Oh,please hurry,Robin.
真好 Ooh,perfect.
"晃晃悠悠地接电话"\n(花很久很久时间) "Take forever to answer the phone."
快点 Ted 有人给了我几片阿司匹林\n我觉得那根本就不是阿司匹林 Come on,Ted. Someone gave me some\naspirin and I don't think it was aspirin.
搞定 Check.
我知道前几天对你们严厉了点 So,I know that I have been a little\ntough on you for the past couple days.
我为此道歉 And I apologize for that.
今天 我们不必担心比赛输赢 So today,we're not gonna\nworry about winning.
我们只要...玩得尽心就好 We're gonna go out\nthere and... have fun.
孩儿们 这些年来 Marshall叔叔\n接二连三地重复那天的战况不下数百遍 Kids,over the years, your Uncle Marshall has told\nand retold the story of this game hundreds of times.
事实上 敌队的孩子可能只大一级 And in reality, the kids on that other\nteam were probably only a grade older.
但在一而再 再而三的描述中\n他们被妖魔化成这样 But,in telling and retelling the\nstory, they came to look like this.
哇! 尽量让他们容易得分 Yay! Way to let them score that easily.
你在那呆坐着 真好 Oh,now you're sitting down. Awesome.
Addison 这不是足球 你不能用脚踢! Addison,it's not soccer.\nYou don't kick the ball!
要是你觉得好玩\n那么玩得爽就是玩得好 Unless that's something that you think is\nfun, in which case, great job having fun.
犯规了 不是吗 Ref? Whoa,that was a foul,wasn't it,Ref?
我不叫Ref 我是Kenny My name's not Ref. It's Kenny.
注意你的语气 And watch your tone.
绝无冒犯 Kenny 干得好 Kenny Oh,no tone,Kenny. Great job,Kenny.
谢啦 Kenny 回见 Kenny Thanks a lot,Kenny. See you later,Kenny.
好吧 Barney 作为你的经纪人 我认输 All right,Barney. As your manager,\nI am throwing in the towel.
打赌到此为止 This bet is over.
你的耳朵貌似欧式早餐中的丹麦点心 Your ear looks like a free\nDanish at a continental breakfast.
不 不 还有一件事没做 "漏斗喝酒" No. No. One thing left. "Beer bong."
马上就来 Coming right up.
我在地下室找到这些诡异的俄国啤酒 Oh,I,uh, found these weird\nRussian beers in the basement.
俄国啤酒? 我要喝Brewski\n(美国的加拿大人说啤酒的用语) Russian beers? I'll take a brewski.
Brewski 明白不? Brewski. Get it?
嗯 有点温 Yeah,it's,uh... It's a little warm.
希望不成问题 Hope that's not a problem.
不 不 好吧 不 别别别 no. Uh,no. Okay. No,don't,don't,don't.
我...好吧 Ted 你赢了\n真讨厌 我恨透这些了 I... All right,Ted. You win.\nI hate this. I hate all of it.
我的背痛得要死 My back is killing me.
派对上大家都认为我是来查毒的条子 Everyone at the rave\nthought I was a narc.
我的耳朵痛得要命 我都能听到... My ear hurts so bad I can hear it...
我能听到我自己的耳朵 试想下 I can hear my own ear. Think about that.
我的衣服...啥...都是啥...\n我...帮我脱掉这鬼东西! My clothes... What is it... What is it...\nWhat am I... Get this stuff off of me!
Ted 我付双倍的钱买你最好的西装 Ted,I'll pay you double\nfor your finest suit.
这里是30块 Here's,uh,30 bucks.
还有包括鞋子 你赢了 Ted And throw in the shoes. You win,Ted.
我再也不会干Murtaugh列表上的事项 I'll never do anything on\nthe Murtaugh List again.
我太老了 干不了 I'm too old for this stuff.
Barney 昨晚我按照列表上写的\n8点就上床了 You know,Barney,last night, I went to\nbed at 8:00 because it was on the list,
但我睡不着 因为... and I couldn't sleep because...
才8点 well,it was 8:00.
于是我决定看"致命武器" So I decided to watch Lethal Weapon.
可我还是睡不着\n于是看了"致命武器2" And then,when I still couldn't\nsleep, I watchedLethal Weapon 2.
然后看了3 And then I watched3.
看"致命武器4"到一半时 我突然发现... And then,halfway through Lethal\nWeapon 4, is when it occurred to me...
Murtaugh老是说"我太老了 干不了了"\n但每次说完 Murtaugh kept saying, "I'm too old for\nthis stuff," but every time he'd say it,
一转身 他又去拍别的电影\n经受更多挑战 he'd turn around, make another\nmovie, and do more stuff.
我想说... I guess what I'm saying is...
让岁数见鬼去 screw being old.
去镭射战场捣乱吧 哈? Let's go TP laser tag,huh?
耶! 然后去医院 Yeah! And then the hospital.
干得好 伙计们 Great job,guys.
至少比分不会记录下来 对吧?\n大家对比分都一无所知 At least we're not keeping\nscore,right? No idea what the score is.
可能是53比0 或许还有其他可能 Could be 53 to zero.\nCould be some other score.
现在是53比0 It's 53 to zero.
我们做错啥了吗 教练? What are we doing wrong,Coach?
你们啥也没做错 You know what? You're\nnot doing anything wrong.
输了也没事 因为在你们一生中 It's great that you guys\nare losing, because in life,
人们会恩泽你们 it doesn't matter how much effort\nyou put in, or how hard you try,
像文凭 工作还有升职之类的东西 people will just give you things.
这和付出的努力 挥洒的汗水无关 Like diplomas and jobs and promotions.
这和你们的表现无关 只要... So,it doesn't matter what you\ndo out there, as long as...
只要你们玩得尽兴就行 as long as you have fun.
那时 Marshall叔叔和Lily阿姨\n不想当着孩子的面吵架 At that point, because they didn't\nwant to fight in front of the kids,
他们进行了一次心电感应交流 your Uncle Marshall and Aunt Lily had\none of their telepathic conversations.
别给我这种表情 Don't you give me that look.
Lily 我受不了了!\n你的教学方式太荒谬了! Lily,I can't take it anymore!\nYour way of coaching is crazy!
别对我吼! Stop yelling at me!
抱歉 Sorry.
我能照着自己的方式来吗? But can I please do it my way?
好吧 你做你的 我做我的 Fine,but I'm going to do it my way,too.
我去拿吉他 I'm getting my guitar.
不知道是Marshall的严厉教学\n还是Lily的温和鼓励法 I don't know if it was Marshall's tough\nattitude, Lily's gentle encouragement,
还是两者的神奇结合体\n在比赛进行到下半场时 or some magical combination of the two,\nbut in the second half of that game,
那破队的下三滥队员们... that ragtag group of\nlittle firecrackers...
输得更惨 got beat down even worse.
事实上 在你Marshall叔叔看来 In fact,according to your Uncle\nMarshall, in the second half,
敌队在下半场愈发高大起来 the other team got even taller.
竟然有人变成了狼人\n(电影Teen Wolf中的人物形象) And one of them turned into a Teen Wolf.
Kenny! 场上有狼人! 这是违规的 Kenny! There is a Teen Wolf on\nthe court! That can't be legal.
我知道狼人长得有点奇特 孩子们\n但尽量让他融入到你们中来 I know the Teen Wolf looks different,kids,\nbut try to make sure he feels included.
哦耶! Oh,yeah!
你怎么不吹他走步 Kenny? How is that not traveling,Kenny?
你要把我逼疯了! 我快疯掉了! You are killing me! You\nare absolutely killing me!
嘿 当心点 教练\n否则我判你犯规 Hey,watch it,Coach, or\nyou'll get a technical.
Kenny 我求求你判我犯规吧 Oh,Kenny. I am begging\nyou to give me a technical.
比赛结束哨声终于响起\nMarshall估计比分是118比零鸭蛋 When the final horn mercifully blew, the score\nwas,by Marshall's estimate,118 to nothing.
即使他们啥也没赢\n但每个人 包括教练都拿到了参与奖 And even though they didn't win anything,\neveryone,even the coach, got a participation trophy.
要是你不想要我也理解 I understand if you don't want it.
我要 I love it.
我...我那么兢兢业业地教学 I just... I worked so hard.
这是对我辛勤耕耘的褒奖 It feels good to be\nappreciated for my effort.
我明白 宝贝 I know,baby.
或许 或许你的教育方式不是很糟 Maybe-maybe your way\nis not totally stupid.
谢谢 你的方式绝对是烂透了 Thanks. Your way is totally stupid.
Stinson!\nStinson!
孩子... Son...
从你加入俱乐部起\n你就是我的眼中钉 肉中刺 you have been a pain in my ass\never since you joined this club.
但是我靠... But damn it...
这绝对是封厕纸中极品中的极品 if this ain't some of the\nfinest TP work I've ever seen.
你官复原职... You're reinstated...
即刻生效 effective immediately.
真的? Really?
才怪! 我这就报警! Hell,no! I'm calling the police!
顶着粉色头发的傻逼扔厕纸\n你这是在逗我吧 Grown-ass man with pink hair throwing\ntoilet paper. You've got to be kidding me.
- 我岁数大了受不了这些...\n- 折腾 他说折腾 - I'm too old for this...\n- ***